I remember the first time i saw you Caleb, You were only 8 weeks ol and you were lying in your food dish at the pet store. I asked to hold you and i was hooked from that moment on. You were small and fit in the palm of my hand and looked so cute with your legs hanging over my fingers. Boy were you a fussy eater though. I went through about 5 kinds and sizes of puppy food till we settled on good old Purina. For the first month i had you i didn't know what to call you, then sitting at my expectant sister-in-laws i picked up her baby names book and started to read them. Well i didn't get very far till i saw Caleb and saw that it meant faithful friend, and Caleb, the 8 short years i had you ,you were like my own baby. You had me wrapped around your lil paws, and you knew it. from the start, people would smile when they saw me drive by with you, because your favorite spot was lying across the back of my shoulders so you could see me in the mirror.As you got older, you got too heavy(good table scraps) to lay there, but still, you never sat anywhere else then but on my lap. You had this cute way of pulling my arm with your paw till you could rest your head there and look out the window. I still tell everyone that you never knew you were a dog.Once we were visiting my brother Mark, and you were playing with his two dogs, Calvin and Susie. Calvin was an older Golden Retriever about 120 lbs, and he stepped on your paw while running with you. Well ,the way you carried on, my heart went to my stomach---you actually limped yowling to me, and i picked you up shaking because i thought for sure he had killed you lol, and i made a fuss over you, kissed your paw, and down you got with calvin and ran around with him as if nothing happened--Mark and denise had a good laugh once i stopped shaking.You played with everthing including your food-running with a mouthfull, stopping, and letting the food roll on the floor so you could catch it. The look on your face while you were eating ice-cream from the stick was as if you had gone to heaven.You were also a perfect gentleman Caleb--never acted up, chewed shoes or socks or furniture, and had the same toys for the 8 years i had you.Your favorite was a little green thingy that was half catapillar and glo worm with wings, but was just the right size for you. I just can't believe how fast those years went, and that you are gone.I guess i took for granted that we would grow older together, you and i, because we were inseperable, and you were a one person dog.As long as some part of you was touching me you were fine. If i moved along the chair or sofa, you would scootch over till your paw was touching me.You had the run of my apartment, because you were housebroken very early.The only real scare i had before you got sick was when your legs went out from underneath you while running on and ice patch 2 years ago. You had to go on a muscle relaxant and pain medicine for about 1 month, then you were good as new. Your birthdays came and went, and you just turned 8 this Jan. 20th. The week of Valentines Day is when my world fell apart.Feb.14th i came home from midnight shift and you had difficulty getting up on your hind legs--i wanted to throw up, because i thought the old leg problem was back, so off to the vets we went. I got medicine to give you , but by the next day, you started to vomit, then you stopped passing your urine. Our vet said to bring you in for observation overnight, and that way they would start intravenous fluids and give you were medicine, and do blood work. I never slept-called off sick, and watched the clock till i could see you. I had a bad feeling, and the vet said words that i'll never forget--there is a more serious problem than Calebs legs--he is in almost complete kidney shutdown. I fell apart--i worked in nursing for 28 years--how could you be so sick and not show any signs? The vet said that most times animals don't show anything till they are critical--Caleb you went right past critical to grave condition. They had you sedated, so you didn't know i was there and i sat by you , held your head in my hands and just cried the whole time i was with you. They did all kinds of tests and tried all fluids to jump start your kidneys, and was told that this was the last treatment for end stage kidney failure and if nothing worked, i had to make a descision by the next day which was Friday Feb. 17th. I was in shock and couldn't even fathom that you weren't coming home with me. Friday, i got the bad news that you couldn't be stabelized, plus this whole time you hadn't passed any urine, and your clotting factor and blood work was way off, so i had to make a decision--Caleb i wanted to take you home with me, so i had asked them not to sedate you so at least you would know i was there. I had your favorite 3 toys, and i had one of my shirts with my cologne on it wrapped around you so you would at least know part of me was there Thursday nite. When i saw you Friday, you were awake and i tried my best not to cry--the first thing you did was look at your toys, and then pulled at my arm to pick you up.Caleb, my heart is breaking just writing these words. I held you, and saw you failing right before my eyes, so i knew i couldn't be selfish and take you home.The staff at the hospital were very comforting throughout, and tried to give me as much support as possible. I couldn't believe i was going to lose you. You were my life and my bestest buddy. So finally at 2:10pm Friday , Feb.17th, you went quietly to sleep in my arms, and my life hasn't been the same. I'm sad all the time, ithink about you all the time, you really were such a good boy. There are so many things we did, places we went together where people talked to us, including the teller at the bank drive throuh who left a treat for you in the container all the time, so that you started to sit up and watch her through the window. People still ask about you. I hear certain songs, eat certain foods, and it all reminds me of you. When i finally went back to work, one of my co-workers gave me a peom called "The Rainbow Bridge", and i started to cry when i read it. You are gone 8 months, and i still feel it is the first week. This past Sunday Caleb, i was reading our sunday paper, and started to read this article about the grief process associated with a lost pet. There was a site for The Rainbow Bridge--i had no idea---so i logged on to the site, and it was like i was meant to find it. The song i heard was Unchained Melody--i broke down and cried--that song was playing on the oldies station in the car on the way home from the vets without you. I started to read all the stories,and realized i wasn't alone in my grief. I can't wait to get you enrolled my baby- i know you are probably having a blast with all your new friends, but i miss you so much .Until we are together again, i love you Caleb.
Your daddy
Charlie