My Dear Sweet Kuci Cat,
You will always be my sweet baby boy. I will never forget you. Your name is from an archaic word, which means The Fruit of God. Your memories are all around me. You came to me 12 years and 9 months ago. It was only two weeks after my Leo Cat, Leonardo de Cat Steele had passed away.

He was fifteen years old. He was sick for about half of those years with asthma and then diabetes. I had to make the decision to ease him into the next life when the vet told me that his lungs were slowly filling with fluid and could not be saved. I cried and cried and cried over him. I held him and cried for two hours before I let the vet give him his shot. I asked him to give me a sign. He pushed the pen towards the permission papers and I signed it. I was laying my head on him and caressing him while the vet gave him his shot. As he took his last breath, I felt that I breathed him in. I felt his energy attached to the top of my head, like our souls were permanently connected. Funny thing, he had been sleeping in my hair for a couple of months before he passed. I was in a river of bloody tears night after night after that. I would cry and Dee Dee Cat would meow. I had a dream one night that some naked Greek men knocked on my door and there Leo was waiting to come back in.

Then, I got a phone call from my Aunt Kathy. She had been to the tanning salon and had seen a very cute little kitty that looked just like Leo. I got in the car and rushed over to pick you up. The girl who worked at the salon had found you in her mailbox that morning. It was a sultry hot day. Luckily she checked her mail before you roasted in that mailbox. As soon as I saw you I loved you. You were prancing around, playing with perfect strangers. You were so very skinny, but so cute with your little white feet tha looked like little tennis shoes , solid white chest and white mustache against your orange tabby body. I took you to the vet. He said it was eery how much you resembled Leo. You were about four months old but you were so emaciated you looked like you were only about 6 weeks old.

Dee Dee hissed at you for the first week, but soon she accepted you. I got you to keep her company. You immediately slept in the bed with me. You would bite my eyelashes, smack the blinds and knock things off of the dresser. You would run really fast and in circles and scamper across my couch. You were quite rambunctious. After a while I felt the energy on top of my head leave me and it went to you. I had a dream that you were two tailed. It was like Leo's spirit had commingled with yours.

After you tore up my couch and several blinds, I knew it was time to have you neutered. That settled you some, but you were still quite a rascal. You chased Dee Dee to the foot of the bed. You demanded reverence by centering yourself on the couch for constant petting and demanding that Dee take the arm of the couch or back of the couch, at least until you decided to take a nap on the other chair. If I stopped petting you, you would bite me or smack me.

Three years later, Dave came into our life. We moved with him to Raleigh. I had to sedate you and Dee Dee to get you there. You both meowed the whole way. For about a month, you were such a scaredy cat that you lived in the litter box. We stayed there a year before we moved to our house in Cary. You and Dee Dee seemed to like it here. Dave became your Daddy. You clearly loved him very much and he loved you back. We feel your memories all over the house.

When I come home I can see your sweet little face, unfailingly at the door to greet me and demanding to be held. Then you would go to the scratching post in your pre-predator stance before you went to your food bowl, demanding to be served. Dee Dee would wait patiently to be served second and you would abandon your food to steal hers. You were such a booger! You liked for me to tend your food and pet you or comb you. Combing always seemed to make you hungry. You were quite a big boy, up to 18 pounds by the time your were about 5 or 6. You demanded the center seat on the couch, between me and Dave. You would bite us if we stopped petting you. We would actually compete for your attention too. Dave used to think you loved me more because of the way you would get up in my lap, the same way you did the night before you passed away.

I can see you lying on the leather chair in the living room. Dee Dee still honors the 8:00p.m. bath time. You two always did that together. When it was time to go to bed, you would always race me up the stairs and leap on the bed. You would rest on Dave's side, facing the door as if you were saving his spot and protecting me, all at the same time. When Dave came to bed you would climb over on my side and snuggle up next to me. In the morning, you would wake us up by jumping on our chests, all 18 pounds of you. You would stretch out if we rubbed your chest and cover our entire torso. You would purr vigorously, to show your happy domination. When my feet hit the floor, you would race me to the food bowl. Even, in your last days when your appetite left you would still race me to the food bowl, lie in the kitchen floor, wag your tail and almost smile with that cute little white mustache.

I loved to see you play. Remember when you first fetched for me? I was serving dinner and you were just a kitten. You jumped up on the table and I threw a piece of cauliflower to distract you. You immediately brought it back to me. Funny, Leo was a fetcher too. After that you fetched various objects for me, including toys and balls, but you preferred cauliflower and grape stems. I loved to see you play. You would chase your toys around and even take turns batting them to Dee Dee. You would climb your cat post and dive through the top holes and hang upside down. You used to do that, then run in circles until I caught you and put you back on the post.

Although you were somewhat of a dominator, you and Dee were best of friends. During the day you would snuggle up together on the couch or the chair in the family room. When Dee Dee had her stroke your behavior changed. You seemed depressed about her. You had been for months prior to that letting her take the center seat on the couch. We did not recognize this as a sign that you could have been sick. You still wanted to see us, but would take second seat, on the pillow in my lap or on the arm of the chair. You started picking at your food and in your last days at home I hardly saw you eat. I thought you were eating off schedule. Your last night at home, you uncharacteristically hid under the bed. I had a dream that I found you stiff, that night. That Saturday morning, I took you to the vet. You had just been in the bed snuggling with Dave that morning and climbing on his chest. You peed on the table when you were examined and the vet was worried about your liver. I took you to the Veterinary Hospital and they immediately admitted you for aggressive therapy. You were placed on an IV. The next morning you started eating fancy white albacore tuna. You would accept noting else. The vet had placed a feeding tube down your esophagus through your nose. I visited you twice a day. You immediately moved towards me and were ready for petting and loving. I brushed you and fed you tuna fish.

On Monday, the vet called and said the tests showed that you had a cancerous tumor. I got the news at work. I was devastated. I was not ready to lose you to the same beast that almost took my life so many years ago. Dave and I came to see you that night. We held and stroked you for almost two hours. You put your little paws in my lap, the way you always did. I wanted to take you home right away and say my goodbyes to you. But, you looked so alert and bright. We wanted you to stay on your I.V. We wanted to give you some treatments so you could be comfortable and stay with us a little longer. I still hear your little meow as the attendant took you away.

The next morning they said you got up about 4:30 a.m., ate some tuna fish, and threw up a small amount of brown stuff. They cleaned your cage up and said you seemed okay. Thirty minutes later they found you passed away. I got the call around 5:00a.m. Dave and I held each other and cried. When you passed, you left a big void in both of us. Dee Dee still cries for you. She attended your funeral, but sometimes seems to forget and think that you are in the garage. She wakes me up crying for you. I haven't stopped crying since you passed. I know I can't hold you here. I am thankful for all of the joy and love that you brought us my sweet Kuci Cat. As the marker on your grave says out back Your Heart is Pure, Your Soul is Free. I will see you once again my friend, by the Rainbow Bridge.

With Eternal Love,
Mama Wanda Cat
2/27/2006