I was always afraid of dogs. I think it started in childhood and I dont know what started it but I know I was just terrified of them. Getting our dog Kaiso was a matter of compromise for me, not of love or desire. My daughter wanted a dog, so on her ninth birthday when we were about to close on our first house, I agreed. It had to be small, it had to be smellless and it should not shed. Those were my requirements. We settled on a poodle after lots of inquiries. He was apricot colored and we drove about an hour away from where we lived to get him. The whole way there I complained that I must surely have lost my mind to be driving an hour away to spend four hundred dollars on a dog, no less. He was a puppy and I held him in my arms on the way home. I was afraid the children would injure him and waste my money. We bought him the biggest cage in the store and then learned it was too big. He hated it. The first night he cried all night long-I went to sleep and left my husband to deal with it. In the middle of the night a crying woke me up-I went outside in the living room-he was not in his cage-I thought to myself that my husband had put him in the apartment next door so that he could get some sleep. The apartment next door was vacant and for some reason unlocked. Then I looked closely at my sleeping husband and saw that the dog was fast asleep in his arms. I cannot say that I grew to love that dog. Or should I say, I did not recognise that I did indeed love him until he died last Friday. I must say that in the week before his death he and I had started to get a lot closer. I felt sad to leave him behind when we had to go out. I was giving him a lot more attention than I had in the past. He was opening up to me a lot more. He ran out of the house and no one knew he was gone until we called for him and he didnt answer. He musthave escaped when my brother left the house. My husband and I drove around for hours looking for our baby. We drove past the place we eventually found him twice. We were looking for a live animal. We expected to see him scampering around somewhere trying to find his way home. Instead we found him in pieces in a major intersection. My husband scraped him together and put him in the car. I collapsed in tears. My children were devastated. We buried him in the backyard in a nice little casket with a dozen red roses. Its been very hard and very sad for us. I miss his little smiling face, and I remember his little sad face. I miss him licking my fingers as I would lie with my hands hanging over the side of the couch. I miss him following me to the bathroom and waiting outside until came out. I remember one halloween catching him with a half eaten mars bar that the kids left hanging around-licking his lips and with a very sheepish look on his face. I remember worrying that he would die from having eaten the chocolate bar. Since his death I pay more attention to my children and to the students I serve in my job. I realize how precious life is and time with others should be spent with them as if its the last day you have with them. He also taught me to overcome my fear of dogs. I can truly say that because of that little six pound dog I can not only pass a giant dog on the street without fear, but I can even pet large dogs and have them jump on me. I love you Kaiso Greene. Until we meet again.