by Britt D.
Painful Parting
It looks like leukemia. Id say she only has 6 months left. She could go through kimo therapy but that will only buy her time. The outcome is fatal. Said Dr. Green.
Ill never forget these words. My dog, Lady, was dying. The previous night I had been rubbing her stomach and I discovered a lump on her stomach. Thinking it was a benign tumor, we took her to the vet the very next day with high hopes that it was nothing serious, boy was I wrong. That lump on her stomach turned out to be a lymph node.
I got Lady when I was only 3 years old, we grew up together. You could say she was a sister I never had. After that she was kept on medication, had a series of blood tests and MRIs.
Why? Why me? Why Lady? The best dog, the sweetest dog! She didnt deserve this! How will I live without her? I cant imagine life without her! I said to myself every night.
Once we found out Ladys diagnosis, she got worse and worse so quickly. We only had her for one final week after that. Her liver became so enlarged that you could see her stomach bulging. That whole week went by in a blur. The doctor thought that the best thing would be for her to be put to sleep. I remember it clearly. We went into a room where my mom, dad, and myself had some time alone with her. I tried so hard to retain myself from holding back the tears. After a while the doctor came in and asked if we were ready. I wanted more time, but I knew Id never be ready. He came back in with a he needle with blue liquid in it. I stayed with her until the end. Ill never forget the sound of her last deep breath.
Her heart just stopped, said the doctor.
I could take it no longer. I took one last glance at her corpse, stroked her and ran out of the room and burst into tears. I literally cried myself to sleep, and even woke up periodically with stomach pains from crying so hard and would start crying all over again when I thought about her. I clutched her collar in my hand the whole night.
We had her cremated. She now lives in a tin can in our figurine glass cabinet. She has her own little shrine. I dont know how Ive gotten through the minutes, hours, days, weeks, and months. There has not yet been one day that I havent shed a tear and thought of her. The one thing I miss about her is her beautiful smell. She would lay on my bed on my pillow all day and when Id go to sleep that night I could smell her. I miss her sweet, kind face, the touch of her fur, the sound of her bark, and so much more. There will never be another dog like her. Ill never say goodbye because she is very much alive in my memories.