I had felt anguish and sadness. Why would I think of playing and taking joy in something else, when it was in front of me all along? I feel immense guilt to this day. I gave up playing videogames, but its too late. All the time I could've spent interacting with him more in some way.

It's easy to do something not related to the bird and think it's fine, but in reality it adds up. You would think "oh he fell asleep, I have some time to play videogames or do something else" Instead of playing games I wished I use the time thinking ahead - making plans to make my bird happier, or playing calm music to him. Every day it adds up. We all get caught in the everyday schedule, and it becomes normalized. Instead of playing, I could be thinking of the next toy to give, such as a jungle gym, or a new variation of peek-a-boo. Using creativity instead of kicking back. Rest is important, but leisure got in the way.

There were times where I did something different. I did get new toys and interact with him many times. We we were together all the time and played all the time, yet added up there were periods of downtime where I could have done better. This is the main heart of this. Even when we were together all day everyday and happy, I could have done more. We have netflix or videogames or social media, but birds, they only have us. We're their whole world.

This is a plea to all bird owners!!! Please don't do what I did. I felt I spent so much time with him even with all the aforementioned things but, no I was wrong. I could have done more!!! He taught me not only joy but to be in the moment and enjoy every second. He taught me so much and I wish I had known sooner, and I can't go back. Even with a good life I gave him, it could have been better. This is my biggest regret in life.