We will always love and cherish all the fun times and there were too many to write about. You are in heaven now our son. Rest peacefully and know you are forever in our hearts - our boy, my POOPER DOOPER! |
Mommy and Daddy
1/16/12 - its only been 3 days since you have left us and our lives are so empty. mommy and daddy miss you so much. the house feels like our hearts "empty" with out you. good night our sweet boy and we will talk to you in the morning.
1/17/12 pm - Well today we picked up your ashes our little boy. We also picked up your medical records and see how sick you really were. We are so thankful to have had you in our lives for the years we did but it's so hard not having you here with us. Now you are back home with us where you belong and will always be, by our sides. We love you our son and miss you terribly.
2/14/12 - Happy Valentine's Day Pooper, Mommy and Daddy just wanted to send you a Valentine and let you know we are thinking about you and wishing you could send us a Valentine in person. We miss you so much and love you forever. Daddy thought he felt you walking around on the bed last night so if this is you sending us messages that you are ok, please keep doing it. While time is supposed to make all things better, it still has not made it any easier for us to be without you. Rest my boy and we hope you have a wonderful Valentine's Day! Now that you are in heaven you can eat all the chocolate you want to enjoy but don't overdo it. We love you Nik. Til we write again.
3/2/12 - Morning my baby, well today is 7 weeks since you left us. Mommy is sitting here at work just staring into space thinking about you and missing you so much. This week has been a really hard week for me and Mommy has been in a really bad mood for some reason. I think alot is because I miss you so much and also Mommy is worried for Nanny. She went for her next scan and we get the results today to see if she is still cancer free. So Nik if you can help Nanny to remain cancer free that would be wonderful. So many sad things are happening lately and Mommy has been so emotional. I know it all comes with getting older and it's part of life but it doesn't mean we have to like it. Mommy and Daddy miss you so much but we know you are in a better place and your health is back to normal. But we miss you our little boy so much!! Well have a great day, go play, eat and have fun. We hope you are meeting lots of nice friends up there. Until we see you again some day. We will write again soon.
3/14/12 - Good Morning Nikki, Daddy is sitting at his desk this morning looking at your jersey shore photo, we miss you so much. The house is so empty without you. We still look at your paw prints that are on the floor, we cant bring ourselves to clean them. We want you to know that Mommy and Daddy really miss having you around and we will always love you. This was a quick note to you this morning, daddy has to get back to work and deal with all his children...Have a good day playing with all your friends today and just keep watching over the both of us and keep sending little signals that you are still around.
4/5/12 - Good Morning Nikki, Daddy is at work early this week and i we just want you to know that we are still very sad and lonely that you are not with us. We still feel empty inside because your not with us. We want you to know that Mommy and Daddy will always love you and will always miss you. We sat on the deck the other night when it was warmer and it wasnt the same because you were not with us. We missed you wanting to go in and out of the house and giving us that little bark ( that we miss so much ) when you want in. Its never going to be the same again. I told Mommy that maybe when we sell the house and move it might take a little pain away from us but the pain will never go away. Well have a great day in heaven and keep looking down on us and sending us little signs that you are ok. We love you and Miss you always.
4/24/12 - Good morning Poopey, Mommy and Daddy are at work today and wishing it was already Friday so we could be in FL and then getting ready for our cruise. We wish you were here with us but know that we can't make that happen. Each and every day we miss you so much but know that you are well again. Nik, it is so hard to be without you. Mommy still cries all the time and I'm just very sad since you are not here with me. I know I need to get out of this funk and I ask you to help me. Please just come to me and let me know that you are ok and give me some peace so I can go on without being so depressed and down about everything lately. I just wanted to say hi and send you love from Mommy and Daddy. We will write again soon, either before or after we get back from vacation but I didn't want this week to go bye without writing to you. We love you and miss you. Have a good day and we'll talk to you again soon.
5/14/12 - Hi Nikker, well Mommy and Daddy are back at work today after being on vacation for a little more than 2 weeks. We had a really nice vacation and a great cruise and got to really relax. This trip we got to take your ashes with us, wearing them in our jewelry. We hope you had a great time with us on this vacation but it's still not the same without your warm, furry body sitting next to us. It was really hard to go away and not think about you. Mommy kept telling Daddy it was so weird not to have to call Nanny and Pop to see how you were doing. We still miss you so much Nikker and we are trying to cope with not having you around. Now that Mommy isn't working 2 jobs, I am going to make time to create some photo albums with all your pictures and also put up a few more pictures of you around the house. The house is very lonely but I keep thinking you are right there with us - we know you are here with us in spirit, we just wish you were here in body but without all the pain and discomfort. We had wonderful weather for our entire trip in FL, on the cruise and again back in FL. On our last night in FL we saw another Shih Tzu that looked alot like you but she was a girl and looking at her made mommy cry and think about you and how much I miss you. I'm sorry I haven't written for a few weeks but it was hard to get to a computer while we were on the cruise and in FL. Please know you are always in our hearts and minds. We are now back at home and carry you next to us, whether watching tv, working on the computer or just sitting in bed. I keep feeling you have not left us Nik but then reality sets in and I know I won't be coming home to that crooked smile and that wagging tail. Please keep giving me signs that you are ok and well again. Play nice with your friends and have a wonderful time. We love and miss you terribly!
6/11/12 - Hi baby, it's been a few weeks since we wrote you and Mommy just wanted to say hi. I had a bunch of dreams this past weekend with you in them where you were laying on the bed all stretched out like you used to and looking up at me. They were so real that in my dream I actually told Daddy, look Nikki's here with us! I know you are here with us always in heart and spirit but miss holding you, talking to you and just having you near me terribly. Just keep coming to me Nikker because each time I see you, hear your bark or hear a noise that reminds me of you, I just know that's your way of telling me you are okay up in heaven!! Just remember we love you, forever and ever. We'll write again but just wanted to say hi.
6/14/12 - Hi Nik, I know I only wrote you a few days ago but I wanted to tell you that our washer stopped working again last night. We hope that's not you telling us you are not doing ok. It's just weird that it started to work again back in February and after you had left us almost 1 month and now it's not working agin and you have been up in heaven 5 months to the date last night when it stopped wooking! So if this is you and you can fix the machine for us again please do! But even if it is you and you can't fix the machine, that's ok...we can always just do what we were doing before to use the machine until we are ready to buy a new one. Well baby, the weather has stopped raining and next weekend we are having another yard sale at Nanny and Pops. It will be very lonely there without you barking while upstairs with Kodee but we will be thinking about you and know that you'll be there with us in heart and spirit. Well Popper, just wanted to say hi while I had a free minute. We love you and miss you. Please keep showing us signs you are doing ok. We'll write again soon but love you forever and ever,
7/4/12 - Happy birthday my little man, daddy is here at work and looking at your photo. We wish you were still here with us so we could celebrate your birthday but im sure your having a great time in heaven with all your friends. Please know that mommy and daddy miss you every minute of every day. It is not getting any easier, the pain of losing you is still with us. Just the other night i swear that i felt you lying between my legs on the bed. Just know that Mommy and Daddy still and will always love you and miss you. Have a beautiful birthday in heaven and make sure you dont eat to much cake and play to much.
7/4/12 - Hi Nik, Mommy didn't want this day to go by without writing to wish you a Happy Birthday! We hope you are having fun today and every day up in Heaven. We miss you so much my baby and hope you are doing ok. The same night Daddy thought he felt you laying between his legs, a few minutes later I thought I heard you jump off the bed and make that thumping sound you always made! We love you baby. Mommy is going away for a few days starting tomorrow with Aunt Irene but I will be bringing your ashes with me and holding them close to my heart. I'll write when I get back Nik but remember we love you very much. Enjoy the rest of your birthday and we'll talk to you soon. Keep coming to us because that joy of knowing you are with us helps us get through this horrible time of missing you.
7/19/12 - Hi Nikker, Mommy is at work and looking at your picture on my shelf, on my computer, on my phone. I have you everywhere! I just wanted to say hi and send you my love. I miss you so much every single day. Daddy is still sick, it's now been 4 weeks so we are going back to the doctor for the 3rd time tonight. We will be going on vacation next weekend with Nan, Pop and Koddee and we will miss you terribly but you will be with us, always. This weekend is mommy and daddy's 12 year wedding anniversary! Remember Nik when Daddy came into our lives and we both became very happy. You loved him so much and he immediately fell in love with you, but what's not to love, you were and are the best son/dog that anyone could ever ask for. I still see glimpses of you around the house and sometimes even feel like you are right there with me. Keep coming to us my son and remember we love you always. We hope you are having fun up in heaven and being a good boy!! I'll write again soon but wanted to say hi.
8/6/12 - Hi baby, well we are home from our vacation at the Jersey shore and we missed having you with us. It wasn't the same without you and Mommy could tell that Koddee missed you too! Nan and Pop didn't really seem to have a good time so they ended up leaving a few days early and went home on Thursday. Mommy and Daddy had an okay time but it really just wasn't the same without you there with us. Nan and Pop are just getting too old to enjoy vacations and that's another sad thing for Mommy but I can't control what they like and don't like so it was for the best they went home early. We got to see our friends from FL and VA Beach while we were away so that was nice. The weather wasn't great for the first 1/2 of the week with lots of storms which would have made you very scared from all the thunder! We came home on Saturday but Mommy caught a bad cold so I've been trying to rest so I can get better to go back to work by Wednesday. Daddy went back to work today and I know he's probably very busy so Mommy wanted to write you today to tell you that we both love and miss you terribly! Keep coming to us Nik and give us signs that all is okay for you. This morning I swore I heard you give out that one bark when you were ready to get up out of bed but when I woke up I knew you were up in heaven saying good morning to me! I love you my baby and miss you. We'll write again but Mommy just wanted to say hi.
9/20/12 - Hi Nik, Mommy just wanted to say a quick hello and see how you are doing. Nanny went for her 6 month check-up and CT scan for her lung cancer and all is still clear - thank God! Mommy and Daddy are going to the doctor tonight for a check up too and hoping all is well. Not much other than work is going on in our lives right now but work has been very busy for Daddy. That's why he hasn't written to you because he is 100% consumed with work these days. Mommy is very worried about Daddy because he is very stressed and not really taking care of himself so please help me watch over Daddy to make sure he is ok and stays healthy and with me for a very long time. Mommy is going for a bunch of tests myself because I'm still having those stomach and throat problems and hoping that this time they will find out what's going on and resolve it once and for all. Well Mommy has to go, I'm at work and my boss just called. I will write again soon but I wanted to say hi and send our love baby.
12/23/12 - Hi baby, Mommy just wanted to write to you and say an early Merry Christmas! We miss you so much and preparing for the holidays just has not been the same without you. Daddy put up his Christmas decorations outside but said it was not the same, not having you inside barking at him, wanted to come out and be with him. Mommy only did alittle decorating inside this year because I'm just not into the holidays. In time I'll get better but right now I'm just down in the dumps. We're going to Nan and Pops for Christmas Eve but you will be with us in our hearts as you always are. We miss you my baby but have a wonderful holiday and Merry Christmas. Give everyone up in heaven a big hug and kiss for us. We'll again again soon but Merry Christmas baby.
01/14/13 - Hi baby, I don't want to say Happy Anniversary because it certainly is not a HAPPY one. It is so hard to believe that yesterday/last night 1/13 was 1 year since you left us and went up to heaven and rainbow bridge. Mommy and Daddy took a ride up to Mohegan Sun on Saturday and stayed overnight because Mommy just didn't want to be in the house for the weekend. I really needed to be away from the place that me and Daddy laid crying for some many hours after you left us. I know there is nothing we can do to bring you back but we miss you so much. Nothing has been the same since you left us. The house is very empty and lonely. Daddy is very unhappy at work and Mommy is starting to worry about him and also think it may be time to start looking to begin our life over again. But we will wait it out again for another few months and see if things get any better. We miss you so much Nikker and hope you realize you are forever in our hearts, prayers, thoughts and dreams. It's been a while since we've had you come to us in dreams, actions, etc. so if there's a way you can start to come to us again, please do. We love you - FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER!!!
2/26/13 - Hi Nik, Mommy just wanted to take a few minutes to write and say hi baby! My heart is still so very empty without you. We still miss you each and every day and while not having you in the house is something we have to get used to it will never be the same. Mommy went on her trip to FL with Aunt Irene and Daddy and Mommy missed each other very much. Mommy's been home for a few weeks but I'm back to my crazy schedule for tax season and know how much Daddy is lonely with both of us at home. If there was a way to bring you back we certainly would have done it but we know you are in heaven looking down on us. Mommy and Daddy really need some time of encouragement these days as things with our jobs is really crappy but we also know we just can't walk away right now. Mommy is hoping that Daddy gets this new job with a new part of DEP which may help us to get back on our feet financially and also help Daddy with the stress he is going through on his job. We miss you our son and love you very much. Please continue to watch over us each and every day. Help us to know you are okay and with us and keep us safe in all our ventures. Please continue to show us you are okay and with us...it's been a really long time since I've felt your presence. We love you Nik and miss you!!!!!
3/28/13 - Hi Nik, Mommy and Daddy wanted to write and say hi. We know we don't write you as often but that doesn't mean we don't still think of you each and every day. We miss you so very much and Mommy is still very lonely inside. Things have been very disappointing for us lately with our jobs. Mommy is unhappy, but for the past 2+ years I pretty much was always unhappy with this last job. Daddy is now really unhappy because the DEP has screwed him over too and it's such a big blow for him and all his hard work. There isn't anything we can do about it but we just keep feeling like these are all signs for us to begin looking to move on from here and possibly even move away to FL sooner than we were thinking. The good news is Daddy got an interview with a new part of the City of NY and Mommy is really hoping he gets this job just so we have more time to try and sell our house and get all our things in order before we really do move to FL. My friend Ellen was actually saying that Nikki is here watching over you both so he will see that things work out. We are just down and out Nik but know things can be much worse. It's been so hard since you're not with us and then not knowing what to do about our jobs, our home and leaving family is kind of too much to bear right now. I told Daddy if he can get a good paying job in FL with CH2M Hill that maybe that's our sign to move in the very near future. So if there's anything you can do to help us out and aim us in the right direction we would really appreciate your guidance! We didn't hit the Powerball last week so we know we need to still keep working LOL!!! Now we just need to figure out do we stay in NY and in our house or do we move on and start over in FL. Help us out Nik because no matter where we go, you will always be with us. We love you baby....please start to come to us again in some shape or form because we really do miss you!!!
5/10/13 - Hi Nikker, how's my little boy? Mommy and Daddy hope you are doing ok. Nothing much is new here other than working and trying to get by each day. We still miss you terribly but we know life has to go on. We are actually thinking about selling the house in the near future all depending on if Daddy gets another job. We are just waiting things out to see what happens and then when the time is right we will sell the house and move, either to FL or somewhere closer to work. Mommy hates to leave Nan and Pop but things are just too expensive up here in NY and it's getting harder and harder to get by financially. It's been a while since I've felt you come to me my baby so please give me a sign some how that you are doing ok. I thought I saw your pee stain in the bedroom by the door show up again the other day but then it may have just been my imagination. Well it looks like a beautiful day outside so I wanted to just say hi and see how you are doing. Daddy is looking into getting that tattoo of you on his leg, we are just waiting for a price. Mommy is going to get a small one of paw prints with your name for now. We love you pooper! Enjoy your day and have fun.
7/4/13 - Happy birthday baby!!! Well today is your 16th birthday and we know you are celebrating it up in heaven and hope you are having a great time. We miss you so much Nik and not a day goes by that we both don't think about you. Mommy is still very sad that you are not here with us but I understand. Mommy and Daddy may be moving to Florida very soon so we can start all over again. It's going to be hard to leave nan and pop up here alone but they keep saying they will be ok so watch over them Nik, okay! I plan to see them every few months with the help of God and him keeping us all healthy and safe. At first I thought I couldn't leave this house because you were here with us but then I realized you were with us in our other condo and you will always be with us no matter where we live, here on earth, or in heaven. We just wanted to wish you a happy birthday and also thank you for showing us you are still here with us and for fixing the washing machine once again. When we do sell the house we are going to bring our washer and dryer with us because it just reminds me of you way too much for me to let go of it. Daddy did get the picture of you finished and he will be getting a tattoo done in August so he will always have you with him in a special way. Mommy is also going to get some small paw prints as a tattoo with your name so I have you with me permanently as well. I love you so much baby and still miss you deeply. Keep coming to me in whatever way you can and know that mommy and daddy love and miss you so much.
7/30/13 - Hi Nik, today is Mommy's birthday and I wanted to say hi and share a little piece of my birthday with you. We miss you so very much but know you are always with us. We haven't found out anything further about possibly moving to FL yet so for now we are still in the house. There is a lot of uncertainty right now which is very frustrating but in time I know things will work out. I can't write too much today because the amount of space we can use to write to you is getting low but I did want to say hi and tell you Mommy knows you are here with us each and every day. Daddy sent me roses today at work and it made me think of my birthday a few years ago, when we first moved into the house, when Daddy sent me roses and balloons for my birthday and later in the day we took pictures of me holding you in my arms. I'll always have the pictures and memories but I do miss my little baby. I love you Nik! Have a great day and go play with your friends.
9/5/13 - Hi Nik, I know it's been a while since I wrote to you but that doesn't mean that I'm not thinking about you each and every minute of every day. We miss you baby and the house is still very empty without you. Mommy and Daddy just got back from a trip to VA Beach - remember those days when we used to drive in the car to go see Nan and Pop! The drive was very quiet without you in the car with us. This trip we went to see Mommy's friends JoAnn and Mike and we had a nice time. It was a restful vacation and we didn't do much but I thought about you alot and so did Daddy. The big difference was we always had you to come home to and that's what we looked forward to but now we don't even have that anymore so it's really tough to want to come home and not see you there. We are still waiting to find out if Daddy is getting a job in FL and if we are going to move but we are really praying that something good happens and we can sell the house and move because things at our jobs are very bad and we don't want to live up here anymore. It will be tough leaving the house with all our memories of you but we will always have you with us so I know in my heart it is just a house and you will always be with us! If you can help us out Nik and say some prayers to help Daddy get one of these good paying jobs down in FL at the Villages with CH2M Hill and then help Mommy find something that pays good enough for us to live down there that would be great!!! We know we can't ask for miracles but any type of help would be wonderful! We love you so much baby and think and talk about you all the time. Hope you are having a great time and we miss you so so much.
12/2/13 - Hi Baby, we know it's been a while since we wrote to you but you are forever on our minds and in our hearts. Mommy wanted you to know that Nan and Pop had to send Kodee up to heaven with you today. Mommy is sad today Nik because Kodee was the one that helped Mommy deal with not having you around anymore and now both of you are gone. He was so sick and we all just couldn't bear to see him suffer anymore. So now you are both together again and hopefully playing and enjoying what is probably a beautiful sunny day at Rainbow's Bridge up in heaven. Please take good care of each other and all the other pets we've had and know we all love and miss you very much. Watch over each other but play and enjoy, we will all be together again some day but until that comes just know we miss our little boy each and every day. Have a great day my son.
1/13/14- Hi Nikki, Well today makes it 2 years since you left Mommy and I. Not a day goes by that we don't think about you or talk about you. We miss you more every day and things around the house have changed since you have left. When you left a part of us died with you. You are now tattooed on my leg and will be with me forever. I had the photo of you down at the shore done because it was my favorite photo of you. It was taken on the dock where you used to look at the ducks. We miss you very much and always will. Make sure Kodee is ok up there, i'm sure he is healthy and running around with you and your friends. Nan and Pop got a new dog, a little guy named Toby. He is a puppy and kinda nuts but a good dog (not as good as you though). Well i just wanted to tell you that we love you and miss you every day and we will always love and miss you till the day we meet. That is a day that i cant wait for, to see you and have you sit in my lap like you used to. But that will come in time. Have fun playing with your friends and once in a while show your presence in the house, mommy really needs to make sure that you still are in the house with us. Sat hi to Kodee for us and i will write soon.
1/13/14 - Hi baby, Mommy just wanted to say hello and let you know we miss you so very much. It's hard to believe that today is 2 years since you left us. We miss you more and more with each passing day. I see that daddy already told you to watch out for and play with Kodee and also that Nan and Pop got a new dog. He's cute, he's a small white maltese and in some ways reminds me of when you were a pup and used to run, bite and chew everything in sight. Nan and Pop aren't used to having such a small dog around but hopefully this is a good thing for them. Mommy really hasn't felt you around the house at all lately and wish you would come to us in some way. I miss you so much and each time I play with Toby I keep seeing you and enjoying all our memories from your crazy puppy days! Well I just wanted to say hi. I won't say Happy Anniversary because for me and daddy it's not really a happy day but it is a day we will never forgot. In time we will all be together but Mommy and Daddy really want to enjoy the rest of our lives together and hopefully things will become a little bit easier for us in so many ways. We love you baby - have fun today, say hi to Kodee and all the other brothers you have up in heaven and enjoy your play time but get some rest.
1/22/14 - Morning baby, Mommy just wanted to say hi and good morning. I hope you are having a good day and are nice and warm and it's sunny up there. We had yet another snow storm yesterday and the weather is really cold! You would be hating this weather since you, like me, used to love sitting outside in the sun and enjoying the warmth. I know I've been hoping to have you to through to us a lot more but I am just not feeling you in the house that much and I miss you so! If you can please come to us in any way possible to just show us you and Kodee are okay. I did see that your birthday came out in the NY lottery #s 2 times in the past week but unfortunately mommy wasn't playing it. We went up to Foxwoods/MGM this past weekend but had a horrible trip luck/gambling wise but it was nice for Mommy and Daddy to get away and enjoy some alone time. We had a really nice room with a jacuzzi tub and got to relax before Mommy starts her crazy schedule with tax season again. Well I just wanted to say hi and tell you I love and miss you. Please come by as much as you can and give us a sign and say hello. We miss you baby and love you very much. Til we meet again someday - enjoy your time with all your friends, brothers and relatives. Miss you,
3/17/14 - Hi Nikker, Happy St. Pattie's day! Mommy hopes you are up in heaven having fun and eating all you want that is good for you! Remember, no chocolate - it's not good for you but I guess a little bit is ok since you are in heaven and enjoying yourself. Mommy and daddy really truly still miss you so very much. So much is different around the house and I think both mommy and daddy are kind of lost without you. Mommy is busy with tax season right now and also helping out Nan and Pop with just everyday stuff but daddy seems to be very down and not into anything these days. I wish there was something I could do to get him our of this funk but right now I'm so busy with so many different things there's not much I can do to help the situation and I feel really bad. But Mom and Dad are going on a cruise at the end of April and I'm hoping that will help both of us get into a better mood and feeling better about lots of things. We really haven't felt your presence in the house much at all lately and wish that you could show us somehow that you are still there with us. I know you are always in our hearts and on our minds but just having a sign you are there would help us! Well I'm at work and busy today but wanted to say hi and that we love and miss you terribly. Be well my son, say hi to Kodee, Beau, BJ, Jo-Jo, Red and Brandy - all your family up there and also all of our family and friends.
5/22/14 - Hi baby, I know it's been a while since we've written but that doesn't mean you aren't always in our thoughts and on our minds every moment of every day. Mommy just wanted to say hi, see how you, Kodee and the rest of your brothers are doing. We still miss you terribly and our life just feels so empty. We are back from our cruise and we had a nice time but daddy had a bad cold and still has a bad cough. Not much else is new for us. We are still working through the process of trying to get our mortgage fixed so we can stay in the house and things with Nan and Pop are good as well. Their new dog, Toby is growing and a crazy dog but he's a good puppy. You both would have gotten along very well except he's got lots of energy, just like you used to. We are going to the Jersey shore tomorrow to just go away for Daddy's birthday for a few days. Hoping to not spend a lot of money, but get some time to relax by the pool, go to dinner to our favorite restaurant for Daddy's birthday and just try to have some fun. Daddy is feeling a little better so we are hoping the weather gets nicer so we can enjoy the outside. Well I'm at work and it's a dreary and rainy day today. I hope your day is bright and sunny and you are having lots of fun playing. Just remember Nik, mommy loves and misses you and I still cry every time I write to you and vision your handsome face.
7/30/14 - Hi Nik, Well today is Mommy's birthday and I'm sitting here thinking about you and how much mommy and daddy miss you. It is a nice day outside and actually mommy just can't wait for the work day to end so I can start our vacation. We are going to the beach and the Jersey shore and wish we were taking you with us. Not much is new with us as you already know since we always have you with us. We just miss you and hope that you are ok up there with all your brothers and the rest of our family. Please if you can, help Nanny and Pop to be able to cope with their new puppy, Toby and also maybe you can help him out to become better behaved for them. We know he's a puppy but Nan and Pop really don't have a lot of patience left and we just want them to be able to deal with him so he becomes a better dog. Send us a sign every so often that you are doing ok because we really don't feel you too often anymore but we do know you are always with us.
10/2/14 - Hi Nik, mommy just realized that it's been so long since I've written to you, so sorry baby! We hope everything is good with you and you are enjoying your time at Rainbow Bridge and up in heaven with all your brothers and the rest of our families. This past few months have been very hectic and lots of health issues for all of us but nothing life threatening thank God! Mom has had shingles for what this Sunday will be 9 weeks and it's really get old now. Plus I broke a toe and just overall have been feeling crappy. Daddy has had a few sinus and knee problems but thank god overall he is doing much better than past years with his heart. We both have not been in great moods for the past few months and Mommy knows that because of all the things I have on my mind dealing with our home, Nan and Pop, health stuff and also still missing you terribly each and every day. I cannot believe in a few short months it will be 3 years since you left us - Mommy and Daddy still miss you very, very much. Neither one of us really feel your presence in the house that much anymore. For me, maybe it's because I should be getting on with how I feel better than I am, but Nik mommy still truly misses you. Also seeing Nan and Pop get older and aging right in front of us is bothering me as well. I know it's life and I have to deal with it but it's just hard. I so want me and Daddy to be happy but these past few months and even since Daddy had to say no to the job offer in FL last October, things have been strained with us. I genuinely do want to move to FL in the future, it's just that our financial future has to get better first. We are going to FL next Wed and will be with Aunt Irene, Aunt Billie and Uncle Eddie. Please watch over us, be with us, as you are each and every day and make sure we have a safe trip so we can return home safely and then deal with what we need to do to save our home and get on with our life. Well I know I've said enough for now, just needed to talk to my baby. Had to let you know I love you and miss you and you are forever in my heart. Daddy misses you too but he deals with things much better than me. I will write again in a few months and after things settle down for us with our house, income tax training and the holidays.
12/19/14 - Morning baby, mommy and daddy just wanted to say hi and wish you an very early Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Nothing has been the same since you left us and mommy is still very sad to not have you in our lifes. I still miss you each and every day and thought by now it would be so much easier than it is to not have you around but it still hurts so much. I miss holding you, cuddling with you, telling you "Nik stop it" or "Nik get over here", it's just very quiet without you. You were and will always be my baby and I do miss you so. But I do know I have to get on with life and realize that things change. I've just been very down lately because things just seem to be taking forever to get our house and lives back in order. I know daddy is right and it will all work out, I just wish it would move along a little faster so I can get some things off my plate and be able to get back to focusing on a happy life with daddy. Anyway baby, mommy just wanted to tell you how much we still miss you and hope you are having a great time and all healthy up in your special place. Please continue to watch over all of us and help to keep us all safe and in good health. Nan is having some bad memory issues Nik so if you can help to make her better or at least slow this entire process down to give her, pop and the rest of us a good quality of life that would be great. Miss you so baby...please come to us more often so we know you are doing ok and hear me speaking to you. Have a wonderful Christmas and we love you!!
12/31/14-Hi Nikki, Just wanted to say hi and wish you a Happy New Year and a late Merry Christmas. There is not a day that goes by that we don't think about you, talk about you and really miss you. You need to come and show yourself to us and especially mommy. She is having a tough time with some things and she could really use your help. Christmas is never and will never be the same without you being in the house. So just wanted to say that Daddy and Mommy miss you and love you very much. Keep playing with your friends and hope to see you soon...
1/13/15- Hi Nikki, just hoping that you are having a fun time playing with all your friends on your 3rd anniversary in heaven. There is not a day that goes by that we don't wish you were still with us. We miss you terribly but we know that you are healthy and safe with your friends in heaven. Please send us a sign today that you are ok and still with us. Have a great day in heaven and know that Mommy and Daddy miss you and love you more and more every day.
4/6/15- Hi Nikki, just sitting here at work wondering how your are doing in heaven, hope you are having fun with all your friends and looking down on us. We will always miss you and love you. Things will never be the same again since you left. Maybe you can send a message to us to let us know your doing fine, we found one of your pee stains under the couch and i dont have the heart to clean it up. Just a quick note to let you know we are thinking about you..Have a good day and talk to you soon. Love you always and forever Daddy and Mommy xoxoxoxo
5/4/15 - Hi Nik, well today is actually 9 years since we bought the house and all I can think about was you when we took you to the house and you had all that room to run around. I remember you going up and down the stairs and loved the way you would just plop on the couch with daddy. We miss you very much and want you to know we always have you in our hearts. We are going on vacation on a cruise in a few weeks and will actually be away for Daddy's birthday but you will be with us, you always are. Mommy has been very busy working and also trying to help nan and pop. Nan hasn't been doing so great and we are very worried that she may have Alzheimer's but stubborn her doesn't want to see a doctor. Maybe you can send her some signs to make her realize she needs to get some help. Pop is beside himself and getting very tired and drained over the entire thing so I just keep praying every day that God will watch over them and us and keep us all safe and healthy. I know some day I will lose them like I've lost you but I do know life will go on until we are all together again. When that time comes for all of us, I hope that God doesn't allow them to suffer and we can go peacefully and no one ever has to make any harsh decisions on care or treatment. Not having you home to cuddle and just talk to while you sit with your head tilted and looking at me with your crooked teeth and smile is something I miss so much. We went on a trip 2 weeks ago for the weekend to CT and Daddy did very well. I was very happy to see him have such a good trip and such good luck, it was very overdue. Well, I'm at work and very busy but wanted to say hi to my baby. Have a great day and enjoy your friends. We will all meet again some day but until then, remember we love and miss you terribly.
7/4/15 - Hi baby - Happy 18th birthday in heaven! Mommy and Daddy are really hoping you are having a wonderful day and get to celebrate with all your friends and family up there. We miss you terribly but we know you are in a better place and all healed now. The weather here today is cloudy and a little rainy so hopefully the sun is shining bright for you up there. Things at home are ok, we got a new living room set yesterday and you would love it, very soft and comfortable. Everything else is fine, just very quiet without you. Nan and Pop are good, no major differences to speak of and all else is just ok. We just wanted to say happy birthday to our baby and miss you terribly. Have a wonderful day, run, play and enjoy.
7/30/15 - Hi Nik, well it's mommy's birthday and another day passes without you here with us. Not much is going on, just busy working and helping Nan and Pop. Nan had some surgery on Monday but is doing pretty well except for her memory problems. Toby is getting so big and is a crazy dog and you would have like him but probably thought it is too fast and playful. We miss you every day and think about you all the time. We still have all your pictures and mementos around the house and they will always be there. Well Daddy will be coming to pick me up in a few minutes but I just wanted to say hi, say I love you and miss you and share my birthday with my little boy! Enjoy your day, play with your friends and remember we love you very much.
10/1/15 - Hi baby, mommy wanted to say hello and tell you we miss you every day! We will be going away to FL for a few days starting this Sunday as long as the weather is ok because they are calling for a possible storm from a hurricane. We are really hoping we can make it out because we haven't been to FL since last Oct and need a big change in scenery. Not much else is new as I'm working tons of hours and just trying to keep up with everyday life. Daddy is good and misses you as well. We sometimes talk about maybe getting another dog but we really just can't bring ourselves to let another dog into the this house. Maybe some day when we are living somewhere else but not now, it's not fair to a pet because we would have to leave them alone too long which is something I hate we had to do with you but thank god you were such a good dog we never had to worry about you. Nan and Pop are ok but Nan is sick and having a lot of memory problems but too stubborn to go see a doctor and get any type of prescription medicine. It's really a shame because if it would help her even a little, it might make things much easier for all of us. Dad is still in his same job and I know wishing we could move but we just have to wait for another few years and get out of this financial situation we are in with the house and bills. We pray everyday you are doing well and still wish we could feel your presence a little more in the house. We do sometimes but I guess I always wish it was an everyday thing. Well Daddy is coming to pick me up shortly so I have to run but I wanted to say hi, tell you how much I miss and love you. Enjoy your days up in heaven and in rainbow bridge and someday we will see you again. We'll write again soon, please pray for all of us, pray we have safe travels, good health and that Nan and Pop will be okay as well.
11/24/15 - Hi baby, Mommy just wanted to say hi and wish you an early Happy Thanksgiving! I still miss you so much and can't believe it will be 4 years since you left us in another few weeks. The house is so empty without you but we do have a lot of wonderful memories. Mommy has been so busy with work, helping nan and pop and now another year of income taxes in approaching so that will keep me very busy. Daddy just got moved to another building so we can't drive together which is a bummer but something I keep to deal with and hoping we don't have a really bad winter or at least if we do I will still be able to work from home. Nanny is not doing too well with her memory problems but she is still as stubborn as ever and won't go see a doctor so there's not much we can do to help her, except just be there for her. Me and Daddy are going up to Foxwoods this coming weekend and you will be with us, like you always are, so we know we will have your luck and love with us! Well mom has to get ready for a doctor appointment but I wanted to say hi and tell you that I love you and miss you. Have fun my baby and enjoy your holiday and every day up in heaven.
1/13/16 - Morning baby, Mommy wants to say hi and I miss you. I don't really like thinking of this day because it is not a happy memory for me. It seems like forever since you have been with us and I will never forget that night when you left us. Me and daddy still think of you all the time and miss you terribly. We know you are in a better ploace and not suffering anymore but it still doesn't take away from us missing you. Four years have now passed and at times it seems like an eternity but we will all be together some day. Just know we love you and miss you. We haven't felt your presence around us in a while so whenever possible please show yourself to us. Enjoy all your friends and family up in heaven,
1/13/16- Hi Nikki, Daddy was thinking of you and wanted to say hi, this day is the worst for us because you left us 4 years ago. There is not a minute that goes by that we don't think of you. I hope you are hiving fun playing with your friends and making new ones in heaven. Maybe you can show us you are still in the house, we miss feeling your presence. Have fun running in the warm sunshine.
7/15/16 - Hi baby, mommy is so sorry it has taken me so long to write to you. Work and home life have been so busy but I know that is no excuse. All I can say is we miss you still and love you very much. Daddy and I just got back from our 2nd cruise this year and while we had fun we lost a ton of money. We were away for your birthday or we would have written to you. We hope you are having a great time and getting to enjoy the wonderful weather, friends and family we know you are with. Things with nanny are still somewhat ok but she is getting worse but luckily still knows us all. If you can send us all some extra prayers to get us through this and also help Nanny out so this disease doesn't totally take over her entire life and memory that would be great! Me and daddy still miss you so very much but we know you are always a part of us and always with us each and every day. Hope you had a very happy birthday my little boy and we love your and always will!
1/13/17- Good Morning Nikki, well another year has gone by. I cant believe that its been 5 years since you left us. The house is still not the same without you but with having your photos all around us it makes it a little easier to deal with. There is not a day that goes by that I wish you were still here with us, but I know your in heaven and feeling great running around with all your friends and not suffering. If you could please send some kind of sign that you are still with us and know that Mommy and Daddy love you and miss you terribly. You are and will be in our hearts every day until we are together again.
1/13/17 - Hi baby, mommy had to work at H&R today and then stop by nan and pop for a bit. I didn't want the day to end without saying hi and letting you know that we will never forget this date and day and most of all never forget you. We still miss you each and every day but know that you are all better know and some how that helps mommy to realize you are in the best place possible. Nan is still not doing well and pop is having a hard time but we pray daily that things will never get too bad that we can't deal. Please keep showing us signs you are here with us and know we love and miss you your always and forever, my little boy!
5/10/17 - Hi baby, mommy and daddy wanted to say hi before we head out for vacation. We say a small puppy today that reminded me so of the day when I got you. But nothing will ever replace you. We aren't ready to get another puppy but did stop in and looked. We still miss you terribly but are a peace that you are no longer suffering. Please keep your eye over us and see that we have safe travels. Nan is still getting worse and Pop still cannot cope or understand that Nan is really ill. Please continue to watch over us and be with all of us as I know you always are and continue to show me signs from up in heaven. We love you very much and miss you. Have a wonderful time with your friends up at Rainbows Bridge.
7/4/17 - Happy birthday baby! Mommy and Daddy wanted to say happy 20th birthday! We hope you are having a wonderful day and playing with all your friends and family. We miss you very much but know someday we will all be together. Please continue to bring us signs that you are doing ok. Also Nik, Nanny is sick and we pray everyday that this horrible Alzheimer's disease doesn't progress too much for her that we have to put her in a home or get an aide so if you have any pull to help us with this wish it would be wonderful! We love you so much baby and know we are always thinking of you.
8/30/17 - Hi baby, mommy wanted to say a quick hello. We hope you are having a great day and time up in heaven and getting to play with all your family and friends. We miss you each and every day and still look for your signs to show us you are around us. We are going away for a few days to the NJ shore and the casinos, hoping we can win some money, but at least would be nice to come home with as much as we are going with. Anyway, Nanny's health is not good Nik and that is really my main concern. Pop is having a very hard time dealing with all of this, he's very overwhelmed. Deep down I am too, but I need to be strong for both of them. Daddy misses you and has been such a great help to me, always patient and understanding and my rock! Well, have a great day, send us some signs and know you are always in our hearts and on our minds.
1/14/18 - Hi baby, mommy and daddy are very sorry we are so late in writing to you. All of our lives have been upside down for many months. Daddy got badly hurt at work on 11/29 and thankfully is still here with us but needs many more month of re-cooperating and more surgeries. Nanny was so sick Nik and God allowed her to gain her wings on 12/29/officially 12/30. While it breaks our hearts to not have her with us each and every day, we know deep down she is in a much better place. She is now all healed and I know that she is up in heaven, joined by her family and loved ones and playing with you, caring for you and all the other fur babies we always owned just like she used to. My heart is so empty to have lost my mom, my best friend, but I just keep telling myself she is in a better place. While I know that's true and she is no longer suffering and free from pain, our pain is not any less. I worry so much about grandpa and pray every day that he will get through this. I have daddy here to help me through but I miss my mom terribly as there is nothing like the love of your mother. Then as things weren't bad enough, I ended up so sick but finally starting to feel better and then daddy gets hurt even more by falling from our attic stairs and breaking his right heel. This coming week is a busy one, filled with many doctor appointments and we're hoping to get some answers on dad's health and be able to move forward. We miss you so much Nik but I now need to really ask you to take care of nanny! Please make sure she is doing ok, continue to help bring us signs, signs from you and Nanny to me and dad and also to grandpa and my brother Benny. Just let us know that all is ok. We love you forever and ever and miss you so. Mom I miss you more than life itself and you will forever be in my heart, til we are all together again. Love forever and ever!
10/11/18 - Hi Nik and Mom, I'm writing to both of you in hopes you both can see and hear my thoughts and prayers. We are very sorry we haven't written, things are very busy but I know you know that. We miss you and will always love you. Life is so different for me. My heart is very heavy and empty without you but now that my dear mom is with you Nik, my heart is so much heavier. I am truly trying to cope with everything and there are good and bad days. Dad is coming along and should be going back to work by 11/26/18 which will be great for both of us so we can try to get some kind of normal life back. I'm still crazy busy with everything from home life, to work to income tax and trying to be there for grandpa. It is so hard to believe that my mom is gone for more than 9 months now. Mom, dad is doing ok but I know how much he misses you. Benny never says anything so I can't tell how he's feeling but I'm sure he misses you, he just deals in different ways. I think of you 24/7 and will never stop. I wanted to write to both you and Nikki and let you know you are forever a part of my world and life and I miss you both so much. Mom please watch over each of us and keep us all safe. I'm hoping Dad will start to go to some senior centers so he can try to keep himself busy and make some friends because I just can't be there for him every day and I will be starting income tax again soon. Well, I will write again but hoping our lifes do start to fall back together. Oh ya, I'm sure you know but I had a dental problem and a dentist pulled out a wrong tooth so I've decided to file a lawsuit because I'm tired of just letting everyone walk all over me. Wish me luck and watch us Mom and Nik. Love you forever and ever. Til we see each other again. I'll write again but I'll need to remove some items from this page as we are running out of room to write. Take care and enjoy your lives up in heaven to my loves forever!!!!