March 21, 2019|
It's officially Kobe's one year anniversary of his passing. He passed away in my arms at 3:50am, after they injected him with drugs to make him go mimi's forever. It's been a lonely year without him. I miss him so much.
I love you Kobe.
*xoxo, your mum
The next 16 years were full of silliness, tons of sugars (kisses), toys, snuggles, scrambled egg treats, pieces of tortillas and probably a ton of other things that I can't quite remember at the moment because I'm lost now.
Friday, September 7, 2018
Thursday May 17, 2018
Thursday April 5, 2018
Wednesday March 21, 2018
We made a plan on getting him started immediately on meds and get him through this crisis. The vet wanted to watch him overnight so we said bye to him through the plexiglass of the oxygenated kennel. We went home.
A little after 3am my phone rang. I knew. The vet said he wasn't responding with the meds and he's getting worse. We raced up there. He needed oxygen no matter what now at this point. When we got him out of the kennel onto a counter he started breathing harder. It was to much knowing that he wasn't getting 100% air into his lungs. We made decisions there that I never imagined I would ever have to make. We all went into a room and I held Kobe in my arms like a baby. I then sat him on my chest with him looking right at me. I asked him to give me sugars and he licked my nose. Those were sugars. His tongue felt so cold. While the medication was being injected Kobe and I never lost our eye contact. He took one last breath and then silence. His head lowered down to my chest and he was gone. I couldn't believe it. In a matter of hours he deteriorated and left my world.
I held Kobe on my chest for two hours. I just couldn't believe it.
Now, I'm just lost. I cried so much last night and early this morning. I sporadically start crying. I'll see something and start crying. It's torture. Kobe was my little boy. I never had children, he was my one and only.
My fiancé has been by my side and I love him dearly but there is nothing that he can do to make things better.
We are planning to ger married Feb 23, 2019 and my Kobe was going to bring our rings down the aisle. The photo of him and my ring is from the night I got engaged.
I'm grateful I found this site that I can somehow manage my grief and loneliness, but it doesn't make up for the emptiness of hearing and smell of our little Kobe.