Jessie loved to travel. She sat in her car seat looking out the window as if she were sightseeing as we drove down the road. She loved to eat ice and would make a snorting sound to get my attention. When I looked back at her, she looked into my eyes, looked down at the cup in the cup holder, then back again to my eyes. That was her way of telling me she wanted ice.|
She was quite the problem solver. Jessie loved to play ball. We bought an entire bag of brightly colored balls, hid them and planned to use them as replacements of worn out, chewed up balls. But one day we came in and found Jessie had figured out how to open the cabinet door as she stood in the middle of the kitchen surrounded by a variety of colored balls. Jessie seemed to be so proud of her accomplishment, we could only laugh, pick her up and kiss the top of her little head.
Jessie was quite the little shopper. PetSmart was her favorite store. She would get so excited and root around in the toys until she found just the one she wanted. Once she found it, she grabbed it and ran for the door. She never really understood we had to pay first. Although she loved new toys, her favorite part was the squeaker inside. All her toys have bald spots where she chewed away the fur trying to get to the squeaker. If she managed to chew through the fabric, she pulled out the stuffing until she reached the squeaker. Many of her toys were just "skins" due to her obsession with squeakers.
Jessie was a very loving, funny, sweet little girl. I've lost my best friend, but my love for her will never fade. I miss her so much, and especially seeing those bright little eyes every morning and kissing the top of her little head.
Jessie the most difficult thing I've ever had to do was say goodbye to you. I will never forget that day. I held you close all the way to the doctor's office, kissing your little head as much as I could cause I knew our time together was short. You loved the sunshine so much and God allowed the sun to break through the clouds on your last day so you could feel the warmth once more. You lifted your face to the sky and almost seemed to be smiling. I understand now that you tried to prepare me for that day and that you were ready, but still, the pain of saying goodbye to you didn't get any easier. You were so calm and turned your fact toward me looking into my eyes as the the doctor did what he had to do. Your sweet little eyes never left mine as I talked to you and petted your little head. I gave you one last kiss and saw the light go out of your eyes. Your little body went limp and I knew you were gone. Jessie, I'll never forget the love and understanding in your eyes that day, no fear only love. Sweet Little Bitty, I will keep you in my heart forever.
4/5/2011 - Jessie it has been twelve days since we said goodbye and I still miss you very, very much. When I walk into the house, I still expect to see you sitting on the end of my bed alert and watching the door for me to come in and tell you how much I missed you while I was gone. But, the bed is empty like my heart. I miss the way you used to look back at me over your shoulder as you walked down the hallway and the way you waited by my car for me to pick you up and put you in your carseat. I miss driving down the road and seeing you resting your little chin on the arm of your seat as you looked for cows in the pastures on the country roads. You always barked at cows and we thanked you for protecting us from the "mean old cows". You were so proud when we thanked you for such a good job. The silence as we drive down these same roads now is heartbreaking. Jessie we picked up your ashes last Saturday and took them to the park model in the mountains where you were so happy. You are now resting on one of your blankets like you did when you were here with me. You will always be in my heart and the special bond we had will never fade. Jessie, I love you, and miss you more than anyone will ever understand. You are still the most precious, special little dachshund in the world. I love you so much, Little Bitty.
9/29/2011 - My precious, I haven't been able to visit you because it hurts too much. I think of you daily; so much reminds me of you. Jessie, I'll never get over missing you. Losing you has caused an emptiness in my life that can never be replaced. I don't have an interest in much anymore, just sort of passing time. I talk to you a lot just like I always did. I wish I could kiss the top of your little head again and feel you snuggle against my neck when holding you once again. I kow it was just a dream, but one night you were so real in my dram, running around playing in the living room, wagging your tail and looking at me with those beautiful, liquid brown eyes of yours. You were so full of life and love . . . it seemed so real I didn't want to wake up. I love you so much Jessie and you will always be in my heart.
December 5, 2011 - Hello my sweet, precious little girl. I miss you so, so much. This is my first Christmas without you and nothing can fill the hole in my heart. You won't be here to open your gift this year but I a video of you opening your present last year. I've watched over and over just to see you running around so excited and happy. Jessie, I miss you so much and nothing is the same since you we had to let you go. I just can't get into the holiday spirit this year, not without you being a part of my Christmas. I'm leaving your gift at your resting place. I wish I could see you tear into it with tail wagging with excitement. You'll be in my heart and thoughts on Christmas Day. I love you very, very much Jessie. You're a very special little girl You're forever in my heart and thoughts. Merry Christmas, Little Bitty, my precious little darling.
It's Spring again little darling. Wish you were here to stretch out in the warm sunshine you enjoyed so much. I have several pictures of you "getting a suntan". Many times I've walked into the living room and pictured you in my mind stretched out warming your little body with the rays of the sun coming in through the window. I don't open the blinds as much anymore now that you aren't here to enjoy it. I still miss you very much, Jessie. You're with me every day and everywhere I go. I carry your picture on my key chain and memories of you in my heart. You are always with me. The video of your last Christmas opening your gift, I watch over and over. Although, it makes me sad to see you running around and not being able to kiss your sweet little head, it also makes me feel good to see you so happy and full of life. I miss you so much, my precious little girl. You're never far from my thoughts and always in my heart.
March 18, 2014 - Another Spring has arrived. In 6 days it will be 3 years since you crossed the Rainbow Bridge and I still feel the pain of saying goodbye to you. I kiss your picture and say goodnight to you ever night. Going to our place in the mountains isn't the same without you. Remember the two weeks just of the two of us stayed there getting the place set up? You sat right beside my feet when I sat on the couch to watch TV. Every time we go there for a weekend, I look at that spot and remember those times. You were the best little dog a person could want. So smart, so precious. You were so funny when Brian would come up on Friday after work. I don't think you wanted him there. LOL You would ignore him as if to say, "Go away". Jessie I will never get over missing you. You were so special. Driving to the mountains with an empty car is almost more than I can bear. I look at the back seat where you used to sit in your car seat and my heart breaks all over again. You were so cute the way you used to look out the window, with your little leg propped on the side of the car seat. You would search the fields and pastures for cows then bark and bark at them. I used to look forward to Spring when the two of us could enjoy getting away from our routine and stay in the mountains. We used to sit on the porch at night and listen to all the night sounds of dogs in the distance, traffic, etc. Now that you are gone, I don't really care to go there much anymore. Just isn't the same without you. Jessie, I love you so much and miss you more than I can say. Things just aren't the same without you. I love you Jessie.