Welcome to HOLLY's Rainbow Bridge Memorial Residency
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Memories of HOLLY
Six months later, my diva Chihuahua is so greatly missed. I saw a dog treat Holly liked on the weekend and moved to take it off of the shelf to buy. Six months later, out of the blue! Habits... they can break your heart when you least expect it. I grieve Holly more as time goes on; she was a special, sweet girl. Cushing's Disease took her health and life at age 8 although Holly struggled with health issues since the age of one (after 1st year immunization - something went wrong for her then). Yet, she was a happy, friendly Chihuahua who thrived on human attention. Holly lived for attention and treats! I hope she's receiving lots of attention from angels ...playing; running around and eating all the treats she wants. Cushing's and insulin dependent diabetes took away some of her joy near the end as she couldn't walk & had a very bloated abdomen. It was awful for her yet I continue to struggle with the fact I consented to euthanize my fur baby. When I saw minimal quality of life I agreed ...I feel so guilty although logically I heard there was nothing else to do, she wouldn't improve. Grieving continues ...my Holly deserves my grief and to be remembered because she brought me joy. As long as I live, she will be remembered.

January 20, 2016
Soon it will be 10 months since my little fur baby Holly passed away. I missed her dreadfully over the Christmas holidays. I would like to think of Holly and not feel such acute grief. I had a memorial glass picture/plaque created with her paw print (from vet) attached to the stand I will soon receive. I captioned it something like "Holly had my heart at Hello and kept it at good-bye".

I have a new puppy, a long haired Chihuahua named Poppy. I received Holly in December so she was "Holly" and I received "poppy" at the end of November so I chose poppy. Holly was a short haired Chihuahua. It was probably too soon for me to bring another puppy home but I sooooo missed having a dog in my life. Poppy will never replace Holly, dogs are not replaceable as some people seem to allude.

I was shocked by 'guest book' feedback, it was very unexpected. THANK YOU to people who took time and messaged me about my girl, you are very kind. I only responded to a few because it was difficult. It is very emotional for me. Yet, I greatly appreciated comments from people who appear to understand this grief.

April 9, 2016:

It is one year since losing my Chihuahua Holly post struggles with acute Cushing's Disease and Diabetes. I brought her to a new vet for second medical treatment opinion and I left the appointment alone. Driving home was awful. It was surreal. The cliché that there are no adequate words to describe how much I miss my girl is so true. I can't describe the impact of this grief. I have grieved the loss of humans but losing my fur baby overwhelmed me ...at a time when most people expect life to be business as usual thinking it was just a dog. I know it will always impact me because she was a very, very special girl. She deserves my grief. I feel such anger when I read Chihuahua has a long lifespan... up to 18-20 years. I had Holly for only 8 years. She should still be here.

I have not 'seen' or 'felt' my girl but my puppy Poppy barked at absolutely nothing yesterday in my bedroom so I hoped it was Holly visiting. Poppy was very agitated ...and I had no idea why. It's nice to have a puppy as she's sweet but I'd still take Holly in a heartbeat (so I feel sorry that the bonding isn't as strong, at least not yet). The puppy drives my cat Luna crazy ...I think back to how she annoyed Holly as a new kitten [attempting to play with a 2 year old Chihuahua who seemed bitter about her arrival]. Holly liked a kitten at her doggy daycare (she even snuggled) but I guess the difference was that kitten didn't go home with Holly. I received Luna on April 9th seven years ago today... another anniversary, this one an arrival. I never imagined I would have had a 6 year old cat and no dog last year; I got the kitten to keep my diva Holly company! Luna grieved the loss of her doggy sister too.

Holly was an adored, unique, original diva girl that still has my heart. She always will.

October 4, 2016:
On September 30th Holly would have been 10 years old. This was the second birthday without my fur baby since Holly's passing in April, 2015. Holly's 'sister' Poppy turned one on September 15th. She's a long haired Chihuahua, not short haired like my girl Holly. I do see some slight reminders of Holly although they are very different dogs. I greatly miss my high maintenance Holly. I sincerely hope there is a rainbow bridge where she is waiting until I am with her again.
Poppy is due for her one year immunization. Holly became ill after her one year immunization (again at the three year immunization ...whereas she continued to decline in health ...I don't think it was a coincidence!) so I am nervous to take Poppy ...although I believe immunizations are the right thing to do. I suspect Holly was allergic to something. I heard of a vet who checks them prior to see what they need. I may do this for Poppy. I don't want another puppy to suffer as Holly did. My heart still breaks for my girl and all she endured.

April 9, 2017:
Two years today since Holly left this world. Two years since I needed to euthanize my fur baby. I miss my girl so very much. It appears time helps me to endure this loss this forced adjustment. It feels so much longer than 2 years now!
I hope my girl is well wherever she is (hope there is a rainbow bridge where she waits for me and cat Luna) and playing like she used to before she became so ill. I think of her all the time. I miss Holly.

November 25, 2017: I just renewed this page for another year. One month until Christmas and just found Holly's Christmas stocking ...I can't seem to throw it away and, bought a new one instead of using it when Poppy had her first Xmas here. I miss my girl.

April 9, 2018: Three Years today. ☹️ I miss my special girl, she will never be forgotten. I looked at photos still on an old cell phone of Holly during her last months of life. She looked sick but I couldn't fully see the extent. Still breaks my heart. ❤️❤️❤️ Thankfully I remember the good times too. For anyone who grieves the loss of a fur baby, you are not alone and never apologize for your feelings or say, "I know it was just a dog". You have a right to feel the loss of a special little soul. Take care

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