Six months later, my diva Chihuahua is so greatly missed. I saw a dog treat Holly liked on the weekend and moved to take it off of the shelf to buy. Six months later, out of the blue! Habits... they can break your heart when you least expect it. I grieve Holly more as time goes on; she was a special, sweet girl. Cushing's Disease took her health and life at age 8 although Holly struggled with health issues since the age of one (after 1st year immunization - something went wrong for her then). Yet, she was a happy, friendly Chihuahua who thrived on human attention. Holly lived for attention and treats! I hope she's receiving lots of attention from angels ...playing; running around and eating all the treats she wants. Cushing's and insulin dependent diabetes took away some of her joy near the end as she couldn't walk & had a very bloated abdomen. It was awful for her yet I continue to struggle with the fact I consented to euthanize my fur baby. When I saw minimal quality of life I agreed ...I feel so guilty although logically I heard there was nothing else to do, she wouldn't improve. Grieving continues ...my Holly deserves my grief and to be remembered because she brought me joy. As long as I live, she will be remembered.|
January 20, 2016
I have a new puppy, a long haired Chihuahua named Poppy. I received Holly in December so she was "Holly" and I received "poppy" at the end of November so I chose poppy. Holly was a short haired Chihuahua. It was probably too soon for me to bring another puppy home but I sooooo missed having a dog in my life. Poppy will never replace Holly, dogs are not replaceable as some people seem to allude.
I was shocked by 'guest book' feedback, it was very unexpected. THANK YOU to people who took time and messaged me about my girl, you are very kind. I only responded to a few because it was difficult. It is very emotional for me. Yet, I greatly appreciated comments from people who appear to understand this grief.
April 9, 2016:
It is one year since losing my Chihuahua Holly post struggles with acute Cushing's Disease and Diabetes. I brought her to a new vet for second medical treatment opinion and I left the appointment alone. Driving home was awful. It was surreal. The cliché that there are no adequate words to describe how much I miss my girl is so true. I can't describe the impact of this grief. I have grieved the loss of humans but losing my fur baby overwhelmed me ...at a time when most people expect life to be business as usual thinking it was just a dog. I know it will always impact me because she was a very, very special girl. She deserves my grief. I feel such anger when I read Chihuahua has a long lifespan... up to 18-20 years. I had Holly for only 8 years. She should still be here.
I have not 'seen' or 'felt' my girl but my puppy Poppy barked at absolutely nothing yesterday in my bedroom so I hoped it was Holly visiting. Poppy was very agitated ...and I had no idea why. It's nice to have a puppy as she's sweet but I'd still take Holly in a heartbeat (so I feel sorry that the bonding isn't as strong, at least not yet). The puppy drives my cat Luna crazy ...I think back to how she annoyed Holly as a new kitten [attempting to play with a 2 year old Chihuahua who seemed bitter about her arrival]. Holly liked a kitten at her doggy daycare (she even snuggled) but I guess the difference was that kitten didn't go home with Holly. I received Luna on April 9th seven years ago today... another anniversary, this one an arrival. I never imagined I would have had a 6 year old cat and no dog last year; I got the kitten to keep my diva Holly company! Luna grieved the loss of her doggy sister too.
Holly was an adored, unique, original diva girl that still has my heart. She always will.
October 4, 2016:
April 9, 2017:
November 25, 2017: I just renewed this page for another year. One month until Christmas and just found Holly's Christmas stocking ...I can't seem to throw it away and, bought a new one instead of using it when Poppy had her first Xmas here. I miss my girl.
April 9, 2018: Three Years today. ☹️ I miss my special girl, she will never be forgotten. I looked at photos still on an old cell phone of Holly during her last months of life. She looked sick but I couldn't fully see the extent. Still breaks my heart. ❤️❤️❤️ Thankfully I remember the good times too. For anyone who grieves the loss of a fur baby, you are not alone and never apologize for your feelings or say, "I know it was just a dog". You have a right to feel the loss of a special little soul. Take care
April 9, 2019: Four years today!!!! I thought I wouldn't renew this page but then I recently went back to see if I could and did.... Missing my girl is a way of life now. I've adjusted (I guess that word sort of fits) but there are still moments when the loss is felt greatly. If we are fortunate we have a pet who is extra special (beyond the usual special) and my Chihuahua Holly was extra special to me. Wow! Four years feels like both forever ago and yesterday. 💕🐾🐾
April 8, 2020: FIVE years tomorrow since my Chihuahua Holly died. I will miss her forever although I have adjusted to carrying this grief. Yet again I wasn't going to renew but couldn't do it ...kept this active for another year although I don't come to this page. Maybe having her here and reading the pain won't feel so intense over time may help someone else newly bereaved. Forever Missed! My little heart :)