Emma passed away due to Bloat and moved to the meadow in nov '98 - taking with her, a piece of my heart - i will never be the same !!!!
- (jan 21st, 1999)
I miss Emma so much today....................
Its been two months since she passed on, i still see those big brown eyes, so full of love and adoration, and that perfect little black-button at the end of her nose. She was my best friend. The best confidant anyone could hope for, and to me, a gift from God - my happiness in, at times, what seemed a very unfair world. Emma saw me through so many rough times, I wonder if she knew just how much she meant to me !! There were times that she was the only one I lived for -
Some days my guilt is so overwhelming - I try to bury my emotions, its easier than dealing with the guilt of not being there, the sadness, and the loss. I wish i'd been there when it happened, i can't bear to think of the pain she must have been in. I let her down in the end, I should have been there to hold her in her time of need, just as she was there for me so many times..... I just wish i could turn back the clock. I think that this is the reason I can't deal with the loss even though i know it has to come out.
When I open the door to let Shannon in from the garden, I wait, just for a moment, maybe Em's is right behind her..... I come home and Shannon jumps all over me with her tail wagging furiously, and i look beyond to see if Emma is snoozing on the sofa. Shannon is getting smothered with all the love and attention she deserves, she must be in 7th heaven - bless her.
My wish ? one more day - even just an hour - to smother Emma, one last time, to cuddle her and tell her how much I love her, and how she will always be my "first" child and my best friend - but mostly, just to tell her "Thank you".
(MARCH 11th, 2003). - Hiya sweet girl.... i miss you.... i'm writing today to let you know that Shannon will be joining you today in the meadow - she will be a little scared and lost, i'm sure - please take good care of her, as you always did - and know that not a moment will go by that you two will not be in my thoughts.... whats keeping me going right now are the memories of you two running and playing, or just cuddling next to me, by the fire - and knowing that now you will be together again.
Tonight rachael looked up at the sky and said she saw a flash go by the moon - i told her it was shannon spotting you and running towards you - that thought makes me smile amidst my tears....
Take good care of each other - until i can be with you - love you bunches..... always and forever - mummy xxx
(march 31st - 2003)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY - BIG GIRL !!! 11 today - wow - we are going to do, as we have done every year, and send you some balloons today - be watching for them won't you !!
Miss you bunches -
NOV 21, 04 - OK - look - you've been gone way too long now, i need you to come home. I could really use my bestest friend back here right now. Wow, its been 6 years and i still miss you like crazy - don't know why i'm suprised, i knew that i'd always have an empty spot in my heart after you'd gone. Today was particularly bad, don't know why it was worse this year than the past couple. We watched video's of you, shannon and the kids the other day - it made me smile - you were so beautiful and so incredibly kewel with the babies. You were and always will be, one in a million !
December 29 - 05 - Hi big girl - been thinking about you a lot lately..... and missing you - as always ! Somebody asked me the other day if I believed there was a heaven.... of course there is..... thats where I'm meeting you again! Love you - with all my heart - mum xxx
MARCH 1ST - 07 - Hi Baby - wow its been a long time since I wrote - just thinking of you this morning cos I turned the page on the calendar and noticed you would have been 15 this month. I can't believe it was 15 years ago that I first layed eyes on the most beautiful face and my best friend ever. Doobie joined you last May, I know you would have loved him, hope you guys found each other... He's the best kitty ever, Emma. Fiona felt the same way about him that I did about you - but you know all that right... Love you sweet girl - always and forever!!
NOV 21st, 07 - Hi Baby - its that time of year again - Isn't it supposed to get easier each year? - We got rid of that sofa yesterday that you used to lay on and watch people outside - Shannon kept it warm for you, then Maggie and Doobie used it to cuddle on..... it needed to go, after all these years... but it was hard to get rid of it - it had so many memories in those beaten up old cushions. Love you.... eternally!!
NOV 21ST, 2008 - ten years - can't believe it - i was just telling fiona yesterday about the fun you used to have with dudley and we were laughing about the crazy relationship you guys had - :o) - I miss you - but I've spent 10 years missing you and I think I finally get it - time does not "heal" but it does become a little "kinder" - I'll always miss you and wish we had more time. Love you - mum xxx
NOV 22, 09 - 11 years :o( - I love you today like I did then and will always miss you immensely
NOV 21st, 2013 - 15 years have passed by and I still think of you often, how you would handle certain situations that have been going on, and how I would have faired if you had still been by my side... you were and always will be my best friend. We have had other "fur babies" come and go - all, I have loved and all, I miss terribly - but none quite as much as you baby girl - love you always and forever <3 xxx|
Please also visit Shannon.