I can truly say that Buster Brown was one of the greatest joys in my life....I adopted him from a shelter when he was one year old, after he was relinquished by an older lady who couldn't take care of such a wild puppy without a yard for him to run around in. Buster came to my home to join me and my chocolate lab puppy, Hazel in January of 2002. I called Buster my "Jack Russell terrorist"....he was so energetic, and loved to run and chase the birds and squirrels in the backyard- Buster even got in a fight with a raccoon one night and won the battle! I never needed a doorbell at my house, because Buster was my watch dog and would bark anytime someone was walking up to my house- people knew I was protected. Buster and Hazel loved to swim and I took them to the lake by my house often to cool off in the summer, and we loved to go for walks to the park and chase the ball in the yard. Although a lot of people thought Buster had too much energy to spend, when it was just us alone, Buster was the biggest cuddlebug you would have ever met. He slept right next to me every night, and curled up next to Hazel, his best friend, whenever he could too. He always just wanted to be loved, and I gave him all the love I could. Buster really taught me HOW to love and open my heart to receiving love, and I will always remember him for that. |
Buster jumped my backyard fence many times in the 8+ years I had him, but I always found him on the next block, just sniffing around and meeting new doggie friends to play with since Hazel is getting older. On Sunday night after we went to bed, something must have called Buster out to protect the backyard, because I woke up at 4am and he was missing, something that had never ever happened in the middle of the night. Confused as I was, I drove around for hours and hours, whistling and calling his name until long after the sun came up. I had a terrible feeling in my gut that I was never going to see my best friend again. At 3:00 that afternoon I received a call from animal control, who had found Buster in the road, having been hit by a car. My world crumbled and I screamed out in agony....how could this happen??? God has a plan for us all and it was Buster's time to go, although he has left Hazel and I with huge holes in our hearts that can never be filled. It's so hard to understand the reason he was taken from me, but I am glad I know that he is up in Heaven at Rainbow Bridge waiting for us, rather than having to wonder the rest of my life what happened to him and if he would ever come home. There will never be another dog or friend like Buster, but I know that time has to heal my hurt and make me whole again someday. Hazel and I will stick together and provide each other some comfort now that the house is quiet and empty, and we will remember all the wonderful times we spent with Buster and his silly antics. He was the best dog ever and I miss him so much!!! As many others have stated, there is nothing like the unconditional love of a dog, who is always there for you to lick your tears away, open your heart, and put a smile on your face just by wagging their little tails. You will never ever be forgotten Buster, and I will always love you and be thankful for the beautiful times we had together. Goodbye my Weasel......RIP my Friend <3 XOXOXOXOXOXOXO
Here is a beautiful poem I was given, helps to heal and know that there is a bigger plan for all of us....
When God had made the Earth and Sky,
the flowers and the trees,
He then made all the animals,
the fish, the birds and bees.
And when at last He'd finished,
not one was quite the same.
He said "I'll walk this World of mine,
and give each one a name."
And so He traveled far and wide
and everywhere He went,
a little creature followed Him
until its strength was spent.
When all were named upon the Earth
and in the Sky and Sea,
the little creature said, "Dear Lord,
there's no name left for me?"
Kindly the Father said to him,
"I've left you to the end.
I've turned my own name back to front
And called you DOG, my friend..."
Hello my sweet Buster Brown.....I have missed you SOOO much in the last week, at many moments it feels unbearable, like my soul and heart are broken in two. It was one week ago today that I took you and Hazel to the dog park and let you run so free, as fast as your little legs could carry you, after the ball again and again for over an hour until the storm came in. You played with lots of dogs that day, but were happy to go home to your best friends, me and Hazel....I am still so at a loss for why you left us that night but I've been focusing on all the wonderful memories you left me with. I printed some pictures from and old CD this morning, and there were some beautiful photos of you sleeping on the couch with me, looking up lovingly into the camera, and laying beside Hazel. I miss you most when I go to bed at night and you're not there right next to me. I miss not hearing your collar jingle when I come in the house. I miss you curling up at my feet while I sit at the computer. I even miss your barking in the backyard.....I love you and will cherish all those memories forever, you were the BEST DOG and I'm definitely looking for the signs of you that you're sending ;-) XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO FOREVER......Mama Lindy :)
Well Buddy, I cannot even believe over two weeks has gone by. Although I have been extremely sad and cried "buckets of tears" as Papa Tom would say, reality has set in a little bit that you're not coming back. Hazel and I miss you so much, and today was a hard day. Looking at other dogs at many shelters, I know more than ever that no dog will ever, in any way, compare to you...you meant so much to me and I am still and always will be heartbroken over this. I can tell how lonely Hazel is and she misses you terribly too....she just sits by the window and waits for you to come home. That's why I thought a friend would be good for both of us-- show us a sign when it's the right time that a new friend is a good and healthy thing. I am going to lay you and your ashes to rest soon, wondering still what will suit you best. Still looking for signs, please keep sending them!! I miss you sweet buddy, so much....!!! ;'-( (((((Hugs and kisses Buster Brown XOXOXO)))))
Buster, I miss you every single day. I hate it that you're not here. I hate it that I probably could have prevented this.....it still hurts so much ;'-( I love you buddy.
Thanksgiving is tomorrow.....I am so thankful that I had you in my life for so many years, Buster. You were my best buddy and brought so much JOY to my heart. I still miss you SO SO SO much, my heart hurts all the time when I think about you or look at your picture or your ashes sitting on top of my desk. But I am happy that you're up in Heaven and know that I will see you again someday. Hamilton is our new friend, although he could never replace you. I wish he was a better companion to Hazel like you used to be. We are all just trying to get along and move forward...life is HARD ;'-( But as I said, I am so grateful for the times we had together and I will never forget you my Weasel....you are in my heart FOREVER!!! I love you Buster Brown, and miss you terribly, all the time...XOXOXO
How could I have known that when I wrote here last, that I had less than 24 hours left with my precious chocolate angel, Hazel?!?!??? Buster Brown, I think Hazel Brown's heart was broken when you died, and she missed you so much that she had to come home to Heaven to be with you and God. Hazel died Thanksgiving morning after a very short and hopefully painless battle with the evil cancer....I miss you both SO much, but my heart believes that you are together again and you are both angels watching down over me, and Hamilton too. I picture you and Hazel seeing each other for the first time and running up to each other to greet with kisses and so much joy that you are reunited. The sudden deaths of both of my most beloved furry friends has hurt me deeply this year...but I know I will see you again some day, and will be thinking about you with the most loving memories of all the good times with you and Hazel, until then. XOXOXO My sweet babies, please let me know that you hear me and know that you'll never be forgotten. Help to heal my heart while I miss you so much......I love you guys SO MUCH, FOREVER!!!! Rest in peace with the Lord until I get to see you again someday.
I saw the most beautiful and amazing sight the other night, and I'm SURE it was you two, Buster and Hazel....driving up the side of the mountain to work, a beautiful doe was standing on the side of the road. She looked at me with her big beautiful eyes and shook her ear.....then after work, driving down the from the top, a gorgeous buck with tall horns pointing toward Heaven was standing in the road, overlooking the valley. I know this was a sign that you both made it to Heaven and are with each other, and that is a big comfort in this very sad time. My life feels so changed and different...now Hamilton and I are the only ones around, and it's quiet here....I can't bear yet to take out your kennels where you slept, or put away the food bowl that still has Hazel's food in it from the night of her sudden death. I saved the fur from the last time I brushed Hazel and put it in the memorial book I made for Buster. You two will live in my heart forever no matter where I go, but it helps somehow to keep your physical presence closeby in my house too....don't stop sending me signs guys, and I will never stop looking....I hope WE are reunited sooner than later too, I love you and miss you....XOXOXOXOXOXO <3
I attended the candlelight ceremony tonight in your honor...Ginny reminds us how animals have the most beautiful souls of all, by teaching us how to love unconditionally...you guys were that to me and I miss you SO MUCH!! Letting Hazel go in my arms was no easier than Buster going missing and turning up dead....but I am thankful neither of you suffered pain or got old and sick. You were both such blessings from God to me, and I know you are now my angels up in Heaven ;-) It's hard not to think about the last days and cry, but I do have so many wonderful memories, even of the days I got you both...and our bond grew SO strong over the years!! I only cry for me and because I am sad you are not here, but I know you are happy together running around at Rainbow Bridge....love you SO MUCH my babies!!! You will NEVER be forgotten and my heart will always love you! XOXOXOXO <3 <3 <3
A new year....I only seem to be more sad, more often now. As the end of 2010 approached, all I could feel was how glad I was to be saying goodbye to one of the hardest years of my life. People don't understand, how I ACHE missing you both!!! I found a short video tonight of Hazel Brown laying outside in the carport-- it was taken a week after Buster died. She looks old, and sad, but the same sweet soul that I loved so much for so many years. And both of your ashes sit here on top of my desk, and I look at them every day. It's been almost 6 whole months Buster, I cannot even believe that!!! Both of your kennels are still in my room, and I don't want to take them out. I don't know if it's unhealthy or makes me more sad, or prevents me from moving on...I just don't know. All I know is that you two were my family, and I miss you every single day, SOOOO much....Love Forever XOXOXO
Happy birthday my sweet Buster Brown....you would have been 10 years old today, if you had not been taken from me so early. I was recounting the story to a friend tonight of what happened the night you disappeared....literally made my heart break all over again just remembering how I woke up and you were gone, and the horrible feeling in my gut that something horrible had happened. Even though I drove around for hours and hours looking for you that morning, there was something telling me I wasn't going to see you alive in my arms ever again, and I didn't. I have so many wonderful memories of the sweet cuddlebug you were, and how much you loved me back. You were always SO happy to see me, and I am so thankful that I had you in my life even though losing you was the hardest thing I have ever gone through. I know you and Hazel are up in Heaven and I believe that you are together, waiting for me. The mystery of your death will haunt me all my life until I'm finally able to join you someday. But I don't want this to be a sad post even though you know how much I miss you every day-- I love you still with all my heart, and just wish you were here to celebrate your birthday, because I would have given you some special treats, love, and attention if we were celebrating 10 years....you and Hazel stay close to God, and send me some signs that you're not as far away as it feels like to me. I love you <3<3<3 XOXOXO
Another wonderful poem, every word of it SO TRUE!!! I love you and miss you both so much!!! XOXO
JUST A DOG
From time to time, people tell me, "lighten up, it's just a dog,"
or "that's a lot of money for just a dog."
They don't understand the distance travelled, the time spent,
or the costs involved for "just a dog."
Some of my proudest moments have come about with "just a dog."
Many hours have passed and my only company was "just a dog,"
but I did not once feel slighted.
Some of my saddest moments have been brought aobut by
"just a dog," and in those days of darkness, the gentle touch
of "just a dog" gave me comfort and reason to overcome the day.
If you, too, think it's "just a dog," then you probably understand
phrases like "just a friend," "just a sunrise," or "just a promise."
"Just a dog" brings into my life the very essence of friendship,
trust, and pure unbridled joy.
"Just a dog" brings out the compassion and patience
that make me a better person.
Because of "just a dog" I will rise early, take long walks and look
longingly to the future.
So for me and folks like me, it's not "just a dog"
but an embodiment of all the hopes and dreams of the future,
the fond memories of the past, and the pure joy of the moment.
"Just a dog" brings out what's good in me and diverts my thoughts
away from myself and the worries of the day.
I hope that someday they can understand that its' not "just a dog"
but the thing that gives me humanity and keeps me from being
"just a man" or "just a woman."
So the next time you hear the phrase "just a dog,"
because they "just don't understand."
Hi Guys.....Missing you a lot lately ;'-( I look up at the sky and watch the clouds move and look for signs that you're there-- my butterflies haven't come this year, or I haven't been looking....I was reminiscing a few days ago about our 4th of July trip last year to the mountains....I took you both with me on the camping trip with 100 other people and dogs, and it rained SO hard, and we all just snuggled together in the little one man tent! You guys were such good dogs, and you had so much fun that trip. The time we went with Dave and Duke was really fun too-- Buster you were curled up in my lap and Hazel at my feet by the fire all night :) I wish you were here again, and I'm dreading the anniversary of that dreadful day coming soon Buster....be with me and bring me strength and peace. I love you both so much XOXOXO
Yesterday was hard, and today has been too....it's really hard not to re-live the entire event over again in my head, remembering the pain and anguish of a year ago. I was looking around all day for signs of you Buster, but all I could think was-- did you cross this street in the middle of the night? Did you really jump the fence in the backyard?? How the HELL did you end up so far away from home??? I tried to focus on the good memories, of throwing the ball for you in the backyard and you would run over and over to the water bowl to jump in and get your feet wet :) Or how cute your little stubby tail was....and how close you liked to snuggle next to me unlike Hamilton does~ I miss you SOOOOOO much, and Hazel too. I really pray that you guys are together in Heaven, you were my best friends in the whole world and my heart still has not even come close to healing yet. Even driving past the vet's office where we brought you and my Dad carried you inside....oh, it HURTS BUSTER!!!! I love you buddy, I wanted this to be happy post about all the wonderful things you were, and it is....I just miss you ;'-( RIP my Weasel, I'll never forget you!!! Give Hazely big kisses for me and send me some signs that you two are happy.....XOXOXOXOXO
So I am going to my first therapy session today....it has been hard to admit to others how sad I am inside, but when they took my intake interview and asked if there was an event that triggered my depression over the last year, how could I deny that it began to go downhill after you two left my life?? And I still sob and cry so easily whenever I think of you. I DO have those wonderful memories but I am SO SAD and confused STILL!! It's been over a year and I know there is no time limit on grief, but I just wish all the time that I could turn back the clock and change things. I am so afraid to let Hamilton outside at night now, because I fear that something bad will happen to him too. I've had several nightmares that I killed him by accident too.....I miss you both and life is hard to understand when my best friends were so shockingly ripped away from me. It just doesn't make sense ;'-( I wish your spirit would come into my heart or show me a sign that you're up there waiting, and that this is just part of life. It will happen to my parents, and to my future pets, and to me someday...we are all mortal and only have a short time on this Earth. And I know that God took you from me in the easiest way he saw possible...but it hurts, bad. I love you guys <3<3<3<3<3 XOXOXOXOXO
Thanksgiving is around the corner, and although I have a LOT to be thankful for, I am feeling sad lately as the one year anniversary approaches of your passing, Hazel Brown.....I had an awful dream last night, and can't hardly remember what it was about but somehow your death was mistaken and the ashes I have on top of my desk weren't really yours?!?? All I know is I woke up in the middle of the night crying, and missing you so much....I remember after Buster died I held you so close and had you sleep on the bed with me even though it was hard for you to get up there-- I pet you in your cage and scratched your chin and told you sooooo many times how I loved you SOOOO much and you were my sweet chocolate anget-- well, you still are ;-) The night Tanya helped me get you in the car and I took you to the animal hospital only to find out you had terrible cancer....ugh, it is so hard to re-live that horrible moment but I can't help it!! You seemed FINE earlier that day, out playing with Hamm in the back yards, and next to me that night. I love you sweet princess, and not a day goes by that I don't miss you both TERRIBLY, and with my whole heart....I love you guys XOXOXOXO
It is Thanksgiving morning, and I'm missing you both. Hazel Brown, as Hamiliton and I were walking through the park the other day, I was thinking about how many times our feet had walked that path, together. You were the sweetest brown dog EVER, and your kind and gentle soul will live with me and live on forever. There will never be another dog like either of you, and I hope and pray that you're in Heaven with God and that I will see you again someday. Your unconditinal love shaped me as a person and grew my heart and I will NEVER forget you. I am glad you passed quickly and without pain, although a year ago today was one of the hardest and saddest days of my life. I know that Rainbow Bridge will take care of you, and I'll never stop looking for signs that you're watching down on me. I wish I could give you big hugs and kisses today, but my heart is still very thankful that I had you both for the 9 wonderful years that I did. I love you Hazel and Buster XXOOXOXOOXOXO!!!! :)
Hello Buster and Hazel Brown ;-) I had a good cry this morning, reading through all my memories that I wrote about over the last year and a half (?!?!????!!) that you've been gone...I still miss you both SO very much, and I am still grieving, obviously. Therapy has helped me some, and Hamilton has become a loving little sweetheart that I just adore. I wanted to attend the candlelight ceremony tonight, but I will be working, as I always am it seems. So this prayer in my heart and here at Rainbows Bridge goes out to you that you hear me, and know I still love you and think of you all the time. Rest in peace my sweet babies, and send me a sign that you're waiting for me ;-) XOXOXOXO
My sweet babies, I still think about you all the time and miss you SOOOOO much. Even if I don't attend to this memorial site as much now, you are still on my mind and today I cried with Ryan, remembering how 2 years ago, Hazel was still here....I have so many happy and wonderful memories of the joy You both brought to me over The 9 years we spent together. I am a better, more loving person now because of The unconditional love you showed me, and I will Be forever grateful to you two for that....missing you lots today and hope you're running around Heaven together as best friends and the two happiest dogs
My sweet Buster and Hazel...still thinking about you all the time, and cherishing the memories I have of how much I loved you. And you loved me back, UNconditionally. I hope God in Heaven is holding you tight and know that you will never be forgotten and will always live in my heart <3 I love you both SOOOOOO much!!! xoxoxoxo
Hello my beautiful chocolate Angel...I felt so awful for not realizing that the other day was the 3rd anniversary of your passing onto Heaven :-( It was 3 years ago, the night before Thanksgiving, that I had to let you go. One of the most painful sad things I've ever had to go through was holding your body as your soul passed over. But the wonderful memories of how sweet and precious you were to me will never be forgotten. I will always love you with my whole heart, and I do still miss you. I guess time is just healing....finally. Send me signs of love and that you and Buster are together...I will see you someday ;-) xoxoxo
Sweet angels Buster and Hazel....STILL I think about you and miss you both. My life seemed very different when I had you two active puppies. It's all a journey- from adopting you when I thought I would marry Roger, to calling on my best friends and neighbors when you passed away. You were family and I will NEVER forget you....all my Love :) xoxoxoxoxo
5 years ago today, my life changed...I still sit here and hold your ashes in my hands, and re-read and re-live all of the memories we shared together...one of the greatest blessings in my life that I am most thankful for is you two, Buster and Hazel Brown!!! Time passes and the pain heals some, but there will ALWAYS be that special place I'll hold in my heart for you. I always think of you when we are at O'Kane park, and I wonder sometimes if I should spread your ashes over there. Or maybe I should plant a memorial for you in my backyard that you used to love so much...I'm thinking of you today, and sending my love to Rainbow Bridge xoxoxoxoxo
Sweet chocolate angel Hazel Brown....I teared up today when the "memory" popped up on Facebook that reminded me that it was 5 years ago today that YOU died. Tanya helped me so much that night, as I had to put you in my car and take you to the emergency hospital. Then she came in an hour later as I was putting you to sleep and watching you take your last breath. Nothing in this world is harder...I still miss you SO much, and the love we all shared-- you, me and Buster Brown. I love Hamilton more than anything as well, but I was so much happier in my life at the time you were in it. I miss you. Send some signs....xoxoxo :-) <3
Hello Buster Brown and Hazely Brown...I have seen a lot of tiny feathers float by me as I'm sitting in my office lately-- I don't thinnk it's from any down comforter or anything, and up I look, and there you still sit, as ashes, on the top of my desk. I still miss you very much. I love you both and hope you're happy running around at Rainbow Bridge...since I have no kids of my own, I'll look forward to reuniting with you one day, as you were my kids, and my little family....xoxo :)