Ayla was a smart, feisty, playful little schnauzer. She had such a strong personality. She had likes and dislikes. She liked to lay in my lap for belly rubs when she was a puppy, she liked her ears rubbed too. She disliked when I would dance to music...unless she was in my arms dancing with me. She disliked morning walks in the rain... on wet grass... She loved her time with her daddy though... laying with each other watching tv, taking walks, laying out in the warm sun. I was envious of her at times because her life looked like an eternal vacation and I wished I could be on it everyday with her.|
Ayla was more to me than a pet. She was my best friend, my confidant, my teddy bear, and my child. She spent 16 years of my life with me...and I'm 35, so she's been with my half of my adult life. The years that mattered most. The years of crucial development as a young adult. She taught me so much about life. How to be patient, how to be responsible for someone or something else. She taught me how to get into a routine. She taught me to appreciate the little things. She taught me how to communicate without words, but most importantly she taught me what unconditional love really felt like.
I knew losing her was going to be the hard, but i didn't think it was going to be the hardest thing I've ever had to get through. You just can't prepare yourself for the loss of someone special in your life. I tried, but prepared for a completely different situation than what occurred. Just goes to show...
Its been over a week and I am still in shock that you aren't here sitting right next to me. You have such a huge piece of my heart and right now its broken without you. I still look for you in the middle of the night to see if you're laying on the pillow next to me... I thought I heard you scratch at the door the other morning as you used to when you wanted back in from your routine a.m. bathroom appointment. I miss you greeting me when I come home from work and seeing you in the passenger seat looking out the window at everything passing by when we would take a drive. Its just not gonna be the same without you Lady....
I just hope you know how much you mean to me and meant to me. I truly am having a hard time adjusting to this. Daddy loves you so much and wish I could have been with you in your final moments to make you feel at ease. Im so sorry sweet girl. We had a great run Lady... I just hope the rest of my time here goes quickly so that we can be together again. I hope I made you as proud as you have made me. I LOVE YOU TO THE MOON AND BACK
Love Always... Your dad... mikee