You were part of me in so many ways. I feel displaced without you being at my side. You were so precious to me. I am grieving so much and mourning the loss of you. I can't say how much you were loved and adored and how difficult it is to come home and not see you greet me at the door or walk with me and bark in the back seat of the car. I know that you are in a better place with your sisters and brothers but selfishly I miss you and want you here with me. I have tried to always think of you first and I know that I was trying to keep you here with me. I knew you would look at me in that special way one day and I dreaded it. You and I were so bonded and I am lost without you. I am trying to stay strong but every day gets harder, not easier. You always protected and watched out for me. You even knew when I was going to be sick before I knew it. You barked at me and sat next to me until I was feeling better. As you got older, my one job was to take the best care of you, and to be there for you. I never gave up on you and will always love you more than I can ever say. I close my eyes and hold you in my arms and only hope that you are running again, happy, healthy and my guardian angel. TaiTai and Nick miss you. You will always and forever...be in my heart. Where else could you ever be. I am having a terrible time without you here although I know you are on the bridge of beautiful colors, playing with new friends and most importantly, that you can get up and run again. I loved to watch you run and your playfulness. Knowing that makes me happy but I selfishly want you back with me. It will take me a very long time to try and deal with you being away but will always remember your beautiful face, your endless love for me and mine for you. I can always be with you in my dreams and hold you. I'll always be there for my darling. Don't ever forget me my beautiful girl.
4/18/2012: Ami ... I thought about you all day. My baby girl...I love you. I can only try to deal with this if I write to you. Forgive me for all the crying....I know that's not what you want...I'm just having a tough time without you. mom
4/19/2012: Miss my darling girl...goodnight my sweetheart....You'll be in my dreams...that's all I can look forward to right now because at least I can hold you again...i miss u.
4/23/2012: It is really painful and the loss of you is so much. You were my world. My love is always freeflowing to my girl....love mom
4/23/2012: Hello my little darling. My beautiful baby. My thoughts are with you. I miss you very much Ami. I will always miss you. My heart is so empty without you. Nothing is the same. Whenever I come home, I never once thought you wouldn't be there. I always expected to see that beautiful face and wagging docked tail. Even when you were so sick, you always wagged your tail when you saw me. Do you remember our special times on the driveway when you would always bring in my mail. You always loved to have something in your mouth. Those memories are precious to me and I did cherish you every day I had you...I can say that for true. I go to bed each night and wake up each morning and don't see you greeting me to take you outside. We spent so many days and nights on that front porch..remember? I combed you on the driveway in the sun with the gentle breezes blowing your beautiful hair and fur. You were so pretty. I just wish I could hold you. I'll say a special prayer tonight for you and every night after...don't forget me...I could never forget you. Ami~you were my love. love mom
4/23/2012 9:32pm: Ami...I want you to know something. You were my heart and soul. When you died, you took a chunk of my heart away and although I know you feel no more pain and running freely in the meadow...deep down, I know you are looking down on me...I feel it. Please always do...you are missed terribly. I am finding it so hard to be without you. I am trying to stay strong but everything here reminds me of you and not seeing you when I come home, always makes me cry. I feel lost...my darling little girl. mommy loves you....
4/24/2012 8:15pm: Ami...I cried so terribly today. Everything reminded me of you. TaiTai misses you terribly too. He knows his girl is gone and he gets depressed. I do my best to keep him happy but we both feel the emptiness. I love you baby...Tai loves you. Be free and run like the wind my darling. Don't let anything stop you. Please say hi to your brothers and sisters for me; Jake, Tia, Myten, Gracee, Rudy, Harley, Ruby Tuesday, Norman, FieFie, Hoody, Tommy, Tara, Kayna, Leibchen, Daja, Amber, Prissy and my mom's dog Regan. I miss you all. I feel my heart is taking a wringing but my memories of you all will keep my love alive for you.
4/25/2012 6:45pm: Hi my little angel. I miss and love you. Did you see your brothers, sisters and friends? Take care of each other. I am so lonely without you. TaiTai really misses you. You had such an impact on us that we feel estranged from many things and unsettled. I just adored you so much ever since I saw you as a puppy and you were so sick. We spent alot of time at the doctors and finally you started to feel better. The more sick you were, the more I wanted to be there for you and get you well. You and I developed such a love for one another...my girl...my precious baby girl. Ami....you changed my life...I find it so hard to smile, laugh....no matter how funny something is....I can't think of anything happy. I know I am dwelling but I honestly have been lost since ..... I look forward to having you home with me soon. Ami...my baby....i adore you. mommy loves you...
4/25/2012: 11:47pm: Hi babe....can't sleep...just thinking about you and all the things we did together and all my other children who are happily with you over the rainbow. All of you were so special to me and you were all unique in your own way. As all of you are together...it can only be a special place now. Mommy, TaiTai and Nick send you hugs and kisses. love my girl...
4/26/2012 7:57pm: Hi my precious girl. Mommy loves you very much. I can't believe how much you touched my heart. You are my little baby...love u
4/29/2012 9:04am: Hi my darling girl. How's my baby? I miss you more than words could ever say. I look at your pictures all the time. The tears are still flowing heavily but I'm trying. Ami....what can I say? My heart is broken but again...I know you are happily running in rainbow beams with your brothers and sisters. I miss my girl and all my babies... love mom
4/29/2012 6:30pm: How's my beautiful darling girl... I miss my baby girl. TaiTai misses you so much. He is lost without you as I am. I want you to know that I don't let one second go by without thinking of you. Whatever I do...wherever I go....you are always with me and in my heart. love my girl...mom
4/29/2012 6:55pm: To my beautiful Ami...my heartfelt love, appreciation for your wonderful caring and great courage that you've shown all of us while taking care, in the most loving way, of mommy. I can only say that my heart broke too but your spirit will always be a shining testatment of true love and guardianship - Daddy will always love his little girl.
5/1/2012 7:22pm: Ami...I saw a sign today that reminded me of you. The sun had just come up in the morning and struggling to show itself through the trees and just when I was staring at it, all of a sudden the rays came through and hit the pond with a beautiful reflection. Just for that moment, I saw your beautiful face on the water. love daddy
5/1/2012 7:24pm: My beautiful little girl....how is my baby? Are you having fun running on the warm paths of sunbeams? Is my girl happy? I spent my day looking at photos of you in between working. I have such a hard time concentrating knowing you are not here with me. I want to hold you again so badly...this is what I am endlessly struggling on. Not being able to hold and hug you is so difficult. I hold the memories in my heart and close my eyes and see us together. Stay with me in my heart...my little girl.....always know how much you mean to me and how I will always love you. It was so easy to love you.... TaiTai and Nick send you their love. TaiTai specially misses his girl. love mommy
5/4/2012 7:06pm: Hello my little precious girl. I was looking at your pictures today...how absolutely beautiful and pretty you are. You were an absolute angel and had such a heart of gold. You were my protector and I was yours. I love you so much my baby. I have to think you are in no more pain and when you were here, you were. It's such a hard thing to think of. It doesn't matter how young or how old, the pain is still heavy and my heart aches to have you here with me. I am selfish honey....I just miss you and wish I could hold you. I miss looking into those warm brown eyes....our love for each other will live on and on. When I saw you in that pet store window, I knew in an instant I had to have you with me. You were so sick as a puppy but with love and care, you got better and we became very close. You now sweetheart, I became a better person because of you. You brought out so much in me, especially this unending love that will go on forever. You were always will be my love Ami. I am so happy you were and always will be mine. love mommy
5/7/2012 7:25pm: How is my precious little darling. I miss you sweetheart. I think of you always and look at you constantly. I'm thankful that I have so many pictures and videos of you. I never feel far when I have your pictures and your memories so close to my heart. I really miss my girl....it's so lonely without you. love mommy
5/7/2012 7:28pm: Ami....I know angels are shown as white and fluffy billowing pure clouds and that is nice but the true angel does not just include outside beauty but inner compassion, love and faithfulness and that my darling...is what you have given to all of us. love daddy
5/11/2012 8:01pm: Hi my darling. Happy 15th birthday. I am missing you every minute of every day. You are always on my mind. I wish I had you here with me. I still feel very lost without my baby girl. I am sending you a special heart prayer with all my love and thoughts of you. You are a special angel and although a month has gone by since I last saw you, I hold those memories in my heart forever. I can't get you out of my mind. Everytime I come home, every morning I wake and every day I am in that car, I feel the loss of my little girl. I hope you know that I will always love you. You know Ami..... I never thought my heart would break and never knew what it meant but I do now. Happy Birthday to my baby girl. Run with your brothers and sisters and be free. love mommy
6/22/2012: How's my beautiful ... gorgeous girl? Are you running free and happily? I wish I could hold you again. In my dreams I can. I saw your pictures today and cried. I am miserable without you. Tai got very sick after you went to the Rainbow and I've been taking very good care of him. He developed very serious diabetes and on insulin. I cook him special meals at night and hold and hug him and we think of you always....just like this song....I'll be loving you always...so true my darling girl. Although I haven't written here, you know my heart longs for you. Tai needs so much attention and he seemed to get so sick after you left. He missed you alot and felt misplaced like me. I became a better person because of you. I never knew how much I could love ....you always protected me...always there....always loving me...as I always loved and will love you. Tai, Daddy, and I love you. Memories are most precious my baby....
9/15/2012: Hello my beautiful darling angel. I miss you terribly. I ask why I lost my little girl as you were so precious to me. I think about you all the time and miss holding you and kissing you. I walk around the house, drive in the car, walk, and feel awful that you are not next to me. I don't know why I am having such a terrible time .... I guess you really put a dent in my heart. You know, Pat, across the street did something beautiful for you. She brought over some beautiful plants and had a hand-painted rock placed in the center island with a beautiful hand-painted picture of you on the rock "In memory of Ami" and Suzanne, a friend, did it. How you were loved Ami. How I love you and how I miss you. You were everything wonderful...everything beautiful....to me..
12/28/2012: Hello my darling girl. Mommy misses you very much. Ami .... why did you leave me I ask myself. Why couldn't I do more. I have such a hard time knowing I couldn't do more or take away the disease. For my baby girl was so sweet, loving and so precious to me, always protecting me and being my best friend...I find it so hard to not see you, hold you, tell you I love you and just hold you in my arms. Ami....I know you are in a better place but selfishly, I wish you were here. With this...I am selfish. I don't if that will ever change. Please don't ever forget me. At least, I can hold you in my dreams....really my darling.....I miss you something awful. I've never hurt this much.
4/4/2013: Hi my darling. I miss you very much. I always have you in my heart....always. I think about you every day and usually every hour. You were such a big part of my life....I take you everywhere I go...even at work....I pretend you are at my side. You never left my side and as we were so close....it is still hard to go anywhere knowing you aren't right beside me. We had such a special relationship, didn't we my sweet angel? You were and are so pretty...my memories of you will never fade. Tai-Tai misses you. He and I haven't been the same since you left us but we hope you are having fun running again and with your brothers and sisters. Although time goes by and they say that time helps to heal the pain.....but in my case, I am failing. Maybe one day....but not now....it's still too soon. I love you. I can't believe it's been on year. I have a beautiful candle that I'll light for you. I wish you were here again. I hope that when I dream some night, that I can hold you again. This is what I miss. I love you...mommy and tai-tai
2/23/2014: 2:42pm: Hi Ami. I miss you so much...and will always love you and hold you in my heart of memories forever. You were so beautiful Ami....just knowing if I never saw you in that window, what I would of lost in my life is unimaginable. You captured my heart and our bond was so strong. Your face is painted on a stone plaque in the center island with many flowers that will bloom in your honor, in spring. It is the prettiest part of the property....just for you... I know memories can never be forgotten but I do wish I could hold you. Sometimes I dream of you, and can actually hug you. I don't like when those dreams end. I wanted you to know that you were and always will be my special little girl. No one or thing can ever replace you or what we had together. love
2/27/2014: 8:10pm: Oh, my darling baby girl...how I miss you. It is coming upon the anniversary of losing you soon. At this time each year, it is very hard to think of you as gone. I always want you to remember that a piece of my heart went with you. Tai always loved you as I. He misses his big sister. I miss holding you...that I can never get back, although I can hold you close in my heart and soul, but I really wish I could just hold you. There was something so special about you that I can't get over. It was like you were a part of me that I have lost and when I had all of those hard days, you always came up to me, looked at me, and for some reason, you just knew. You didn't want anything....you just wanted to be near me. This I loved about you. How did you know all I needed was to have you near and hug. Your hugs meant everything to me. You were the sweetest angel in my life and I feel such sorrow in knowing you are gone. Always know you were the sunshine of my life. love mommy
6/17/2014: Hi my baby girl. It has been awhile since I wrote to you. How are you my darling? Are you enjoying all the romping? I know how much you loved the snow. Remember how you liked to catch snowballs in your mouth and how cute you looked with a white nose? Oh, how I miss you. You know that TaiTai is there. Have you seen him? Can you, Jake and Tia take care of him? When it's my time, I'll see you all and hug you all endlessly. How much you brought to my life. Without you, I don't know what I would have done. I have the memories that warm my heart but the physical aspect is what I yearn for. It is so difficult to hug a memory. I loved you so much as I did you all. No mommy could of loved you more. I can't wait to see you all again.....I love you.
6/25/2014: Hi Ami. Boy, do I miss you. My heart and soul of a girl. The sweetest baby girl in the world. I miss you very much. I can't TaiTai is with you now. I know you were both close and though my heart is so sad to have lost you both within a couple of years is really terrible. Those beautiful big brown amber eyes and those looks that went right through me. You were very special to me....my baby girl. Do you remember our games, walks and car rides. You were always a good walker and always protected me with your life...thank you Ami. I felt very comfortable with you being my protector. I can never thank you enough. Why of why do furbabies leave this world so soon? I love you Ami...very much and miss you more. Take care of TaiTai for me. TaiTai....take care of Ami. Also, give kisses to Jake, Tia, Norman, Hoody, FieFie, Tommy, Rensch, Ruby, Rudy Rufus, Harley Davidson and Grace. I can't believe how many of you I lost to old age or sickness. I had such a house full and now, I struggle without you all. I love you. mommy
5/30/2016: Hello my darling girl. I miss you every moment of every day. I find it so difficult to come to this site and see my pictures with you in my arms and know you are not with me anymore. You were such a shining light in my heart and you were always there for me, protecting me with everything you had and loving me endlessly as I loved you and continue to love you. You know, my darling baby girl, you changed me forever. I always think what would of happened if I never saw you when you were such a sick puppy staring at me. I am glad I could rescue you and brought you under my wing and gave you a happy life. You livened up the house and you were so pretty. Always remember my sweet angel, that I always think about you and as I was so lost for such a long time, I try to remember you without tears and replace it with smiles, but I am still having a hard time with that. I look in the back seat of the car as you were always there looking at me. You will never be forgotten in my heart, soul and mind. You were and always will be, my girl. I love you Ami....more than you will ever know.
9/12/2017: My precious baby girl. I miss you terribly. I will always love you. You were always by my side and I was by yours. You made my life special and you were more to me than you will ever know. I know you are with your brothers and sisters where you can run freely and have no worries. Here on earth, I long to hold you again but I know that can't happen .... just in my mind and in my dreams. I did have a dream I was holding you and could even smell you but unfortunately, it was just a dream. I wish it was the real thing. Ami, when I saw you for the first time, I knew I needed to have you in my life. It was a dream I never knew I had. I will always love you, my girl. You will always be in my heart. love mommy
3/25/2019: Hi my baby girl. I was thinking of you when the sun was shining on my face this morning and you weren't here. I think of you each and every day and how much I loved and still love you. Physically you are gone but I occasionally dream and are so close to you. One dream I could hug you and it felt so real. When I woke up, I was so disheartened to be in the real world again, without you next to me. You left a huge whole in my heart when I lost you and the only solace I feel is when I know you are at the rainbow with Jake, TaiTai, Norman, Hoody, FieFie, Grace, Myten and all your other brothers and sisters. Knowing you can run free without pain is my only thought I can process because the pain of letting go of you on that horrible day will forever haunt me. I have to get my feelings out in writing this because it is too painful to keep inside. I will always love you, my girl, and you will forever hold a special place in my heart.