Today,January 25 2012, is cloudy and rather dreary looking and I'm feeling really heart broken. The emptiness and grief seem to be rather overwhelming. |
Five days ago, I had to let my tiny princess go to heaven. She was so very special to me. Please don't misunderstand, my human family members are special, too. My husband was there for me. He was right by my side with a conforting shoulder. My son and my parents all shared their love and concern.
But, Amethyst was my furry "forever" baby. She was always with me and needed me every day of her life and apparently I needed her too!
She carved a place in my heart for thirteen (13)years, four (4) months and two (2) days. I could tell her anything, I could squeeze her tight, I could watch her be her, I could hold her when she slept, I could let her ride with me or just sit with me when I read.
She wasn't very big only 4 1/2 pounds, but she provided me with a tremendous amount of unconditional love. No matter if I was in my pj's and no makeup on or dressed to the nines, she always loved me.
Yesterday ,Alan and I picked up Amethyst's ashes and oh how it hurt. I have a special urn to place her remains in and I feel comforted a bit to know my baby's remains will forever be close by.
I can hold them to me and feel close to her again even though I know her spirit is gone.
I can't seem to find the exact words to fully express how I ache on the inside. People say it will get easier with time, and I know that it will, but for now it is devastating.
Amethyst was one of a kind. She had a passion for coconut. She could never get enough. At night, she looked forward to her 2% milk. Most of the time I wasn't fast enough and she would bark continually until I'd give it to her, in her special dish , of course. (She had me trained well!)After her milk she liked her dad to rub her back.
I miss her so very much... I sometimes find myself looking for her or reaching for a treat to give her. When I would run errands, she would ride with me. When we traveled, she would go with us. When we lived in Missouri and flew to Texas, she rode with the family in the passenger section of the airplane. The stewardess even gave her snacks.
THERE IS A NEW STAR SHINING IN THE SKY TONIGHT ...Author unknown
February 14, 2012 "Happy Valentine's Day" I miss you so much my sweet Amethyst. I know you are enjoying the beauty of the Rainbow Bridge and just wanted you to know I think of you every day!!!Love and kisses***MOM***
"For you are the one who makes me whole, you've captured my heart and touched my soul. You came into my life and made me complete, each time I see you my heart skips a beat. For you are the one God sent from above, the angel I needed for whom I do love." author unknown
February 20, 2012.. A month has passed since we had to say goodbye. I love you and miss you Amethyst. But I am happy that you are there at the Rainbow Bridge enjoying new friends. That way you won't be lonely as you wait for us to be together once more. Love always my sweet Amethyst.
August 20,2012... I dreamed of you this morning...And wanted to say... I LOVE YOU!!!...Seven months have gone by..I hope you Daisy, Taffy and Sam are playing and enjoying each others company. I know you didn't know Leo or Missy...but they were poodles like you and they are there. Have fun playing with them, too. Just always know..your human mom loves you still.
December 30, 2013 To my sweet baby Amethyst. I LOVE YOU STILL!!! I know you have been playing with Sam and Taffy, they joined you in the Rainbow Garden. I miss all of you. But, I miss you most because you were my best bud. You have a new little sister. Her name is Ruby Rose and she is a teacup poodle like you. She doesn't replace the special place in my heart that will forever be yours. You were my first teacup angel, sent down for me on the special day in September. I miss you!
January 2015 Sending you lots of hugs and kisses. My sweet baby Amethyst. love you always.mom