Wednesday March 9, 2022 Crystal...the more i process the more I see what an amazing best friend you've been. I have been enjoying going through all of our pictures and today found the pictures from when you first came home with us. Your first toy, that big ball; which is what shows me how very small you were. You were six months old and the home you came from it was clear did not give you a good start; but you came to us with such an open heart and as life went on you gelled to me in a way I never expected. You supported me; you allowed me to support you. The honour of a lifetime was the way you trusted me, even when you were blind and when i realized that last ear infection had seriously hurt your hearing, you waited for me to reach out when you werent sure where to go, and I always did and you would stop if you couldn't hear my footsteps and I would reach out and touch your head and say its ok, follow me and each time you trusted me to lead you I have to say just made me love you so much more. But even at the beginning, as i look through these pictures i realize that you walked in our door and despite your start came with an open heart and began to teach me so much. Through the years you became so much more; and taught me so much about trust and love. This morning i read something that really hit me; it was about grief and that grief is just the unused love I still had to give you; and you know what? Nothing could be truer because I have never felt such a terrible grief before nor have i ever felt such an unconditional love so my girl; the healing continues. But know this,, you are always my cow, my best friend and you are always my heart, we continue our forever journey; this is not the end...to be continued.

Monday March 7, 2022 its been in week since I had to say goodbye to you my sweet cow.. And
yet the pain and loss is as if it was yesterday still. This is yet anither sign if just what you meant to me. I am lost without you, but trying so hard TK put a brave face in for our max. He misses you my girl so much too. I hope you are now at peace and I wish so badly to know for sure that you're ok.. Happy and restored to your healthy self now. You live in my heart but I need so much to know you're here.. Here is but one of the things i have written for you in this past week
I see you in my dreams, tail wagging, head tilted my cow so sweet
As I walk into the living room, and you aren't laying in your facorite spot, I panic, for a quick second forgetting you are gone
Still I pick up your food at the vets with max's food and an awkward silence prevails
As the vets ponder how to tell me you are no longer there
But crystal, this all just tells me more speaks to you and everyone
How much you mean to me which is the very definition of my love.

And anither written two days ago
Crystal I miss you so much
Everywhere I look is where you should be
Every time I can't occupy my mind the emptiness of not having you comes rushing back to me
You are my best friend, my heart and soul, my cow
Without you here beside me everything has changed nothing is left
My heart feels so very empty now
I love you so so much crystal
❤️🤗🐶

I had bugged my daughter about getting a beagle and finally she agreed when we saw a beagle available we quickly went to meet her we met the mom first who was an unmistakable beagle but when we saw little crystal she was more a cow lol. But her surroundings were horrible we stepped outside for a minute then decided we had to take her with us. And so it was.
I wrote this for my Cow... I am no poet so this is more feelings. I wrote this the say after I said goodbye.

Oh crystal , crystal my sweet cow
We went to meet a beagle, but found a gift instead
It was fate we should meet, you allowed me the honour to love you,
As I knew you loved me too
In my saddest days, you'd sit straight up,
I'd lay my head on your shoulders and give you a great big hug.
You are my best friend we've been there for each other
My sweet dog crystal there will never be another
Some days you were my support dog
Others I were your eyes
Some days I'm simply your human
You my sweet cowgirl
others ive been your lifting hand
You helped me to be who I am.
I have no idea how to let you go as you've brought me so very much
as you my sweet crystal allowed me
To feel every day I was so very loved.
We love you sweet crystal. You really are my forever little cow.