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STILL HEARTBROKEN
by Linda Mulvaney.........................................
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WELL HERE IT IS OCT.27TH, 2011 AND IT IS JUST OVER TWO YEARS AGO THAT YOU GEORGIE LEFT US AND IN MARCH IT WILL BE FIVE YEARS ALREADY THAT YOU GILBERT LEFT US.EVERYONE HAD SAID IT WOULD GET EASIER WITH TIME BUY THEY WERE WRONG.THERE IS STILL NOT A DAY GOES BY THAT I DON'T THINK OF THE BOTH OF YOU AND MISS YOU.THERE REALLY ARE NO WORDS TO DISCRIBE HOW I FEEL SINCE YOU BOTH HAVE BEEN GONE.GILBERT YOU WERE MY TOUGH GUY,ONE MINUTE SWEET AS CAN BE AND THE NEXT MY LITTLE TIGER. GEORGIE MY LITTLE SWEETIE.YOU WERE THE MOST SWEETIST CAT I HAVE EVER HAD.YOU NEVER GAVE MOMMY A BIT OF TROUBLE.I WOULD GIVE MY SOUL TO HAVE YOU BOTH BACK AGAIN.I DO KNOW YOU WERE GETTING WEARY AND IT WAS TIME FOR YOU BOTH TO GO. LETTING YOU GO WAS THE HARDEST THING I HAVE EVER DONE.AT LEAST YOU BOTH DIED AT HOME WITH ME AND DADDY AND I KNOW THAT IS WHERE YOU WOULD WANT TO BE.I STILL HAVE YOUR BEDS AND A LOT OF YOUR TOYS AND DISHES.I JUST COULD NOT PART WITH THEM. IT WOULD HAVE FELT LIKE I WAS THROWING THE LAST OF YOU BOTH AWAY.IT STILL AMAZES ME THAT A HUMAN BEING CAN JUST LOVE A CAT SO MUCH THE WAY I LOVED YOU BOTH. WHEN I SAY THAT YOU WERE MY WORLD I REALLY MEAN IT.THE HOUSE HAS FELT SO LONLY AND COLD AND SILENT SINCE YOU BOTH ARE GONE.YOU BOTH LIVED TO BE 16 AND I KNOW YOU HAD THE BEST LIFE.YOU BOTH HAD ANYTHING A CAT COULD HAVE AND I WOULD DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN IF I COULD.BEING AS THAT I CAN'T DO THAT I WILL ALWAYS HOLD THE BOTH OF YOU IN MY HEART.IT IS STARTING TO GET COLD NOW AND I LOOK OUTSIDE AT YOUR LITTLE GRAVES AND MY HEART ACHES FOR YOU BOTH.THE HOLIDAYS ARE COMING ALSO AND THAT IS A VERY HARD TIME FOR ME ESPECIALY SINCE YOU GUYS REALLY LOVED THE HOLIDAYS.YOU BOTH WOULD GET SO EXCITED WHEN WE PUT THE XMAS TREE UP AND YOU GILBERT WOULD ALWAYS LAY UNDER THE TREE.YOU BOTH LOVED THE TISSUE PAPER FROM THE GIFTS AND WOULD HIDE UNDER IT.OH HOW I MISS THOSE DAYS.I AM NOT FEELING WELL RIGHT NOW AND THIS IS WHEN I REALLY MISS YOU BOTH. YOU BOTH KNEW WHEN I WAS NOT FEELING WELL AND WOULD BE RIGHT ON THE BED WITH ME AND LOOK AT ME WITH THAT LOOK ON YOUR FACES. KNOWING MOMMY NEEDED YOU EVEN MORE THEN. NO, TIME HAS NOT MADE IT ANY BETTER I MISS THE BOTH OF YOU AS MUCH NOW AS I DID THE DAYS AFTER YOU LEFT.I KNOW YOU ARE IN THE MEADOW AT RAINBOW BRIDGE AND PLAYING AND HAPPY BUT YOU ARE MISSING DADDY AND ME. ONE DAY WE WILL CROSS RAINBOW BRIDGE TOGETHER. I HAVE TO BELIEVE THAT. GILBERT YOU WERE THE BIG BOY SO I HOPE YOU ARE TAKING CARE OF GEORGIE. HE MISSED YOU SO MUCH WHEN YOU PASSED.HE LOOKED FOR YOU EVERYDAY AFTER YOU PASSED AND NEVER STOPPED.ANYONE READING THIS MIGHT THINK I AM VERY DEPRESSED AND I AM NOT. I AM JUST SO SADDENED BY MY LOSE. DADDY AND I NEVER HAD KIDS SO YOU GUYS WERE OUR KIDS SO WHEN YOU LEFT IT WAS TO US JUST LIKE LOOSING A KID.THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS AND TIMES THAT POP UP AND YOU BOTH COME INTO MY MIND. GILBERT YOU LOVED STRINGBEANS,SO I CAN NEVER SEE OR EAT A STRINGBEAN WITHOUT YOU COMING INTO MY MIND AND I CAN STILL SEE YOU FLIPPING THE BEAN IN THE AIR AND PLAYING WITH IT FOR THE LONGEST TIME THEN EATING IT. GEORGIE YOU LOVED COLD CUTS AND COULD HEAR THE COLD CUT PAPER BEING OPENED ANY WHERE IN THE HOUSES AND COME RUNNING.I HAVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT GETTING TWO NEW KITTIES, IT'S TIME BUT I AM A LITTLE AFRAID BECAUSE I JUST DON'T THINK I COULD EVER GET ANY OTHER CATS THAT COULD MATCH YOU GUYS.I GUESS I CAN'T LOOK AT IT THAT WAY OR COMPARE THEM TO YOU. I KNOW THERE WILL NEVER BE ANOTHER GEORGIE OF GILBERT FOR ME, BUT THERE ARE SO MANY OTHER KITTIES OUT HERE THAT NEED A GOOD HOME AND DADDY AND I CAN GIVE THEM THAT.WELL UNTIL WE MEET I LOVE YOU BOTH RIGHT DOWN TO MY BONES AND MISS YOU AS MUCH. LOVE, MOMMY |
Comments would be appreciated by the author, Linda Mulvaney
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