5/28/21 - Dear Zoey, I cry and miss you everyday. I have my live recordings of you on my phone to watch daily and a picture of you on the TV so I can see you when I'm on the recliner. I remember all those mornings when you'd sit on the windowsill behind me while I prayed every morning. I look for you and you're not there but Maddie has taken your place to watch over me. She has looked for you in vain but realizes you are not here anymore. I know you are watching me from the Rainbow Bridge but I wish I could still see you. I mowed the grass yesterday and looked at the window to see you watching me like you used to but it was Maddie instead. I look over to the couch where you used to sit and make "biscuits" before going to sleep and then I cry again. I look at your chair on the sunporch where you cuddled up in your blanket. I remember you jumping up to the little window in the laundry room and the windows of the sunporch to watch the birds and nature. Oh, Zoey, you are everywhere and the memories are so precious. We had our daily routine, special times when I brushed you which you loved, and the understanding that you loved being petted but only held when you were in the mood. We knew each other so well that words and meows weren't needed except to express love. What I wouldn't give to just hold you again. One morning last week, I thought I heard you behind the couch (your favorite hiding place when you knew a vet visit was that day) and I felt some "love bites" on my hand as I was praying about you.

I'll never forget when you first showed up that cold Nov night begging for food. And so began my journey with you. You didn't want to come in the house from the landlord's barn until you felt you could trust me so I kept feeding you and bringing you inside for short visits but let you out when you whined at the door. I knew you were ready to stay inside when you climbed onto the roof of the second floor and looked into my bedroom window one morning so I brought you in that day to your forever home. You never wanted out again which warmed my heart. What a soulmate you were. The vet said you had feline leukemia and I knew your time with me may be short but the Lord gave me 9 years with you. But that's never long enough because I wanted it to be 20 years and even then, I would still be devastated. I am so looking forward to meeting with you again in heaven. Until then, play and enjoy all your new pet friends at the Rainbow Bridge. You are now healthy again, eating even better treats and running in Paradise - someday all of us left behind will be reunited with all of you never to be parted again. Jesus is taking care of all of you until that day.

It was so hard letting you go but I knew it was time when you went from discomfort to suffering and I never wanted my fur baby to suffer. You gallantly kept walking over to me but spent more time in your solitary spots of the living room and sunporch. And when you couldn't or wouldn't even eat your special treats that you loved so much, I knew you were giving up but I didn't want to give up on you. Words can't describe the pain I feel about losing you but anyone who has lost a beloved fur baby understands. As the song goes, "I'm one breath away from where you are" and at 70, I've got more years behind me then ahead of me. I will cherish what we had and you are always in my thoughts, prayers and heart. Will be picking up your ashes soon and make a memorial to you.

5/30/21 - Zoey, I added a few things to your memorial. Changed the season to summer cause you loved to enjoy the sights, sounds and smells of nature (birds, flowers, my outside cats (we called them our neighbors, etc) from the inside screened windows. Toward the end of your time, I held you outside wrapped up in your blanket so you could really enjoy the sights and sounds for the last time. Oh, how I cried and cried because I knew it was the last time. I also added food, water, an angel (my special angel) and St. Francis who loved all animals. I'm still talking to you because you're in my heart. For 9 years, I told you that you were my "Baby Zoey, the most beautiful one in the whole wide world" and you were to me. I always told you "I love you Zoe" many many times a day. Such bonding times when I brushed you and gave you favorite treats. Rest in peace, my beautiful girl and enjoy an even more beautiful place then here. I'm holding you again in my heart for now.

6/3/21 - Hi Baby Zoey, I went to pick up your ashes, paw prints and a lock of your hair at the vet's today. They also included a pretty card with their sympathy for my loss. Of course, I cried even more today after picking up my precious memories of you. I brought them to the cemetery where I put flowers on Ken's grave. Keep him company up there cause he hasn't seen you for over 3 years and I'm sure he missed you. At least part of you is back home with me where you belong. The other part of you is waiting for me at the Rainbow Bridge. I made a little memorial for you on the TV where I can always see you in the living room. I thought I heard your "meow" yesterday when I woke up (Maddie's meow doesn't sound the same) and heard you bounce on the floor from your chair on the sunporch. (Maddie was sitting on the living room windowsill when I heard the bounce). I would like to believe that maybe that's the Lord's way of letting me know of your presence. The other day, I remembered one of your favorite games I called "Zoe Legs". You used to run behind one end of the couch, lay on your side and just stick your back legs out so I could try to get them. I would say I was going to "Get that Zoe" and you'd give me "Love bites" when I touched your legs, then you'd run to the other end of couch. As soon as I moved away from the couch, you'd run to it again and egg me on to try and get your legs again. We did that so many times on a daily basis and I miss it. I sleep with your little cat pad to feel like you're near me. So many memories and so many tears thinking of. You taught me so much about Life, Love and the Lord's Love for all of us. Sometimes I think I'm all cried out but that's never true. Fresh tears everyday for not having you with me anymore in this life. I added our first "selfie" picture to the collection below. I never stop thinking and missing you, my Baby Girl - you'll always be the most beautiful one in the world to me forever and ever. Love, Mom

6/20/21 - Hi Baby Zoey, so sorry I haven't written for a couple weeks but have been busy taking Lucy to several kid's summer attractions. I showed her pictures of you on my phone and she asked where you were. I told her you went to live with Jesus and the angels. She nodded like she understood and I believe she did. Toddlers don't have the doubts that some adults do. I cry about you everyday no matter how busy I am because you are always on my mind. Just watched the recording of you being put to sleep and bawled my eyes out. When I look at your box of ashes, lock of hair and paw prints next to your picture, I cry. Aunt Glory gave me a statue of a cat laying in the wings of an angel with the words "Good night my friend....Until we meet again" and I cry when I see that. You're so much a part of me and I miss you in my heart, soul and mind. What I wouldn't give to see and hold you again. Also, Pikachu is coming to live here soon with Maddie. Nobody wants him so I'm giving him a home - hope him and Maddie get along, lol. Mr. Gray hasn't shown up outside for days and I'm worried about him - wondering if he has joined you at the Rainbow Bridge? I keep looking for him but no luck so far. I cried for both of you yesterday. I was sweeping the kitchen floor the other day and remembered how you would sit in the middle of it when you first started living here and how I'd carefully have to sweep around you because you wouldn't move, lol. Oh Zoey, everything reminds me of you and I love and miss you so. You were my faithful best friend who was always there waiting for me when I came home from work or anywhere. When I came home from the store, you'd nose around in the bags cause you knew I had treats. I could tell you all my troubles and you listened better then anyone. My heart aches for you and no other fur baby could replace you in my heart, soul and life. Rest and play in peace and health at the Rainbow Bridge until we meet again never to be parted. Please watch over me Zoey and know that my love for you is constant and forever through eternity.

7/5/21 - Hi Baby Zoe - Please don't think I've forgot about you because I haven't written to you for awhile. I will never forget you through eternity. So many things have kept me tied up but I still think of you and wish you were here everyday. I miss you so badly and love you so much. One thing that's kept me busy is Pikachu came here, he was very sick and I found out from the vet that he is diabetic and am giving him shots everyday. Nobody before me knew he had this. And poor Mr. Gray still hasn't shown up so I'm almost sure he's with you now. Say Hi to him for me, tell him I miss him also and you two will now get to know each other better until I see both of you again. But Zoey, no other cat holds a candle to you - my heart sorely aches for you and I want to hold you again. I want to hear your meow, play Zoe Legs again, see you sitting everywhere watching me, eating your treats, talk to you and the list goes on and on. I play my recordings of you everyday and cry. You were and always will be the most beautiful one in the world to me. Someday, we will be together and it will be such a wonderful reunion. You are my wonderful angel and always will be. I keep hoping you'll visit me in a dream where I can hold you again. I know you are at peace running and playing with all the fur babies - if Mr. Gray is with you, help him to get used to everything. Tell him I'll see him again down the road when I arrive at the Rainbow Bridge. Wait for me Zoey and know you are in my thoughts and heart always and forever.

7/17/21 - Hi Baby Zoe, I've been really missing you so much- I cried all the way home from store last week & so many other times almost everyday - I'm still hoping to see you in my dreams but I console myself with playing my recordings of you & looking at your paw prints, lock of hair & pictures - not the same as having you here - I want to hold you again so bad - if love could have saved you, you'd still be here with me - so painful to let you go even if it kept you from more suffering - I have you in my heart while Jesus is holding you till he gives you back to me at the Rainbow Bridge - what a joyous day that will be! I love you, my beautiful Zoey & you are always in my heart, soul & mind. You are my true soulmate forever.

8/9/21 - Hi Beautiful Zoey - I just got done with the vigil and wanted to tell you once more how much I miss you. When I mowed the lawn, a yellow butterfly kept hanging around me and I took it as a sign that you were near. You are always in my mind, heart and soul as I continue on in life without you. Oh, how I wish I could see you here again and hear your cute meows when you wanted my attention for something. Or how you would just come and sit in front of me and I knew exactly what you wanted. We were as bonded as any pet and owner could be. It's been so busy the last couple weeks taking Lucy to the parks and all this summer. But you are always on my mind and that will never change. I keep playing my recordings of you and crying. I keep looking for you in all your favorite spots but you're not there and I cry. Even with Pikachu and Maddie, it just isn't the same without you. We had a special bond that is the golden cord connecting us until I meet you again. I'm glad you are enjoying a beautiful place with all the other fur babies and are healthy again but if love could have kept you here, you'd have never died.
You're my beautiful baby Zoey and I will forever love you.

9/12/21 - Hi, my beautiful Baby Zoe - not a day goes by that I don't think of you and miss you dearly. I saw a cat at a friends house that looked like you and it came and sat by me. My memories of you came rushing at me all at once and it was just overwhelming. I'm constantly wishing you were still here because no other cat will ever take your place in my heart. Oh Zoey, I miss you terribly and see you everywhere. I still call out to you even with my other cats here but am depressed because you're not here anymore. I just keep trekking onward without you because I have no other choice but you are always in my heart, mind and soul. I can't bond with any of my other cats like I did with you. Even though they are special in their own unique ways, they're not you. I want to see you again so much. When I get up, I remember you at the bottom of the stairs waiting for me to come down and give you breakfast. When I feed the other cats, I think of you waiting for your treats after breakfast. When I sit on the recliner, I remember you sitting on the couch looking at me. And of course, I remember you going by the couch and wanting me to play "Zoe Legs" with you. I laugh when I remember you pushing your play mice under the stove on purpose so you could watch me have to get them. At night, I remember brushing you before I went upstairs to sleep. You were my shining light to look forward to everyday. I'll aways love and miss you, baby girl. I'm still waiting to dream of you and hoping it happens soon. Now that the season is changing again, it seems like so long ago, that you were here and yet almost like yesterday. I see you whenever I look at your blankets that you cuddled up with. I look at your picture, box of ashes, paw prints and lock of hair on the TV constantly and cry. Losing you is like a black cloud that never leaves. My only hope is seeing you again when I join you at the Rainbow Bridge to never be parted again. As you watch over me, always know that I love you now and forever.

11/21/21 - Hi beautiful! Once more, I've been tied up with the daily responsibilities of living and didn't write to you sooner. I'm so sorry Zoey - it didn't mean that I forgot about you for even a second. I cried and cried the other night because I miss you so much. I've never been the same since you've been gone. I take care of Pikachu and Maddie plus the "neighbor cats" outside but nobody is you nor will they ever be. Nobody can take your place in my heart and soul. The longer you've been gone, the more I miss you. And now here is Thanksgiving and Christmas without you for the first time. Sad indeed. Lucy still remembers you because your picture is right on the TV and she talks about you sometimes.

12/6/21 - Hi beautiful Zoey. Almost 2 weeks before my first Christmas without you and it just won't be the same. You used to sit on the couch and look at the Christmas tree at night. I was surprised that you never jumped on it. I just cry when I look at the couch and you're not there. Matter of fact, I cry when I look anywhere in the house and you're not there. Even in the car when I remember our trips to the vet with you whining on the way over but quiet on the way back (cause you knew you were going home). But that last day at the vet, you didn't come home with me and I'll never get over that. I will always keep the video of that last day as you fell asleep in my arms and breathed your last as you were on your way to the Rainbow bridge. I was so devastated that I wanted to go with you. Oh Baby Zoey, I miss you more then words can say. You'll be celebrating Jesus birthday with him this year. And someday, we'll be doing that together. I love you so much Zoey and wish you were back here everyday. To just hold you again and tell you how much I love you. We had that special bond that transcends time and space. I hope you think of me often as you play with all your furry friends. I asked Jesus to tell you I love and miss you.

12/31/21 - Hi Baby Zoe - I had a wonderful Christmas with the family, especially Lucy. But I sure miss you more then words can say. When I visited Lucy, her cat Cheeseburgler (who looks just like you) sat on my lap and it was almost like it was you. But of course, no other kitty can ever be you, Zoey. My heart belongs to you forever and I'm starting a New Year without you which is so sad for me. You were the light in the house and who I looked forward to seeing morning, noon and night. Pikachu and Maddie are good kitties but they just aren't you, Zoe. I can't believe it's been 9 months since that fateful day we had to say goodbye - you were so brave through all your suffering and I couldn't stand to see you that way anymore. The vet said it was time to end your pain. So glad I recorded you on my phone so I can keep watching you when you were alive. I'm always crying for you, Zoe and want to hold you again so badly. I earnestly await the day when we will meet again to be together for eternity. I asked Jesus to hold you for me and tell you once more how much I love and miss you. Till we meet again, I'll keep you in my thoughts and heart.

3/13/22 - Hello Beautiful Zoey - Well, here I am in the first spring since you've gone. It's just not the same without you. My heart is still breaking everyday that you're not with me. I always remember you jumping up onto the window in the laundry room to smell the fresh grass, flowers and watch the birds through the screen. I remember you sitting by the living room window watching the birds, outside cats, bunnies and other animals running around in the spring. I remember seeing you at that window whenever I mowed the grass. Oh Zoey, I miss you so much. Maddie is using your food and water bowls but there are some of your items that I have put away because they were just for you and you alone. No words can express how much I miss you - only Jesus knows the pain in my heart. You used to sit on the couch and watch me on the recliner while I had my coffee. We were on the same page so much with everything. And when you were in the mood for me to hold you, it was so nice. You knew how much I loved you and I knew how much you loved me. We were inseparable and yet had our own space. I miss giving you treats which you ran to get. And then we played your favorite game "Zoe Legs" behind the couch. What I wouldn't do to have that fun again. I hope you are enjoying your time at Rainbow Bridge (cancer free) with all the fur babies who are there with you. You and Mr. Gray are probably running together now. I send my love to both of you and wait until we are reunited along with all the other fur babies I have taken care of or have known. Your birthday is next month so I gave you a birthday cake early. May Jesus hold you until He gives you back to me on the day I join you. Until then, rest in peace and you are always in my heart, mind and soul. Love Always My Baby Zoe.

5/2/22 - Hi beautiful Zoey - please don't think I've forgotten about you. That could never happen in my life because I think about and miss you everyday. It's just that sometimes life gets in the way of writing my thoughts. You are always in my heart, mind and soul. It's so hard to believe that almost a year has passed since you went to the Rainbow Bridge - feels like it was yesterday. Lucy has a cat named Cheeseburglar that's 14 years old and looks just like you - whenever I hold her, it's like holding you again but not the same because nobody could be you. I miss you so much and still talk out loud to you as if you were still here. What can I say that hasn't been said already. That part of me died when you did. That I miss you beyond words. That there will never be another cat that can take your place and I wouldn't want them to anyway. That I'll miss you until we are reunited. That I still feel incredibly sad that you are gone. That there's an ache in my heart for you. And I could go on and on.
Just know that you are always in my thoughts, heart, mind and soul and always will be. I love you so much Baby Zoe and always will.

5/21/22 - Well, my beautiful Zoey, it's been a year since you went to the Rainbow Bridge and I miss you more then I can put into words. I so wish that you were still here with me and feel so sad that you're not. I never thought a cat could make such a difference in my life that I'm still broken hearted that you're gone. I love you so much Zoey and hate the cancer that took your life, not to mention way too soon. You gave me such joy that I just can't feel as much with Pikachu and Maddie. But they help to ease the loss. My tears are just reminders of how much you meant to me and will continue to mean. Until we meet again at the Rainbow Bridge, you will always be in my heart.

12/28/22 - I'm so sorry that I haven't written for so long. There's just been so much going on that I couldn't get to it but I want you to know that you have been on my mind everyday. I just looked at your pictures and videos again and cried again. I miss you even more now then I did before. You are my beautiful Zoey and will always be in my heart and mind. I still say your name and hope you would be there. As I come to the end of this year, I pray that we will be together again someday never to be parted anymore. I love you so much Zoey and miss you more then you can know. I trust that you are in the Lord's care at the Rainbow Bridge until we meet again. You are in my heart forever and always. Love You, Baby Zoe.

5/2/23 - I have to apologize again Zoey for not writing for awhile. So much has been going on. I'm moving from here to a nice senior citizen place but will take your memories with me. I will never get over losing you and can only have faith that we'll be together again. The older I'm getting the closer I'm getting to seeing you again. As the song goes, I'm only one breath away from where you are. I can't think of you without crying even after 2 years and this month is the hardest because that's when you had to be put to sleep and I lost a part of my broken heart that day. You are always in my mind, heart and soul everyday but I have to keep going on without you. I will put your memorial in the new place where I can see your picture everyday just as I did here. You are and always be my Baby Zoey and nobody can ever replace you in my heart. I love you Zoey and always will.

8/22/23 - Hi beautiful - I haven't forgot about you (never could) but was tied up with moving the last couple months. The last 2 outside cats went to a nice new home at a horse farm. Pikachu went to the Humane Society who are spoiling him rotten and made him their volunteer office cat. Maddie is with me but since she's so old with many health issues, she may be joining you soon. You'll have to show her around and tell her to wait for me too. I don't have any memories of you at this new home but all my memories are in my heart and mind. I miss all my cats but you the most. We were like soulmates communicating without words. I look forward to seeing you when it's my time for leaving this world. I miss you more then words can say but you are no longer suffering and that's what is most important. God blessed me with you for 9 years and I'm grateful that He allowed me to give you a home. You are my precious furbaby and will forever be in my heart. Take care Baby Zoe and I'll write again soon.